Every count begins from the day of burial, not the day of death. Because we bury during the day, the burial day itself is day one of every count. Keep the Hebrew date of the burial in front of you. In the first year, every calculation starts there.
To move between Hebrew and civil dates, use the Hebcal converter: https://www.hebcal.com/converter
Example. A person dies during the day on Monday, 22 Iyar (May 30, 2026), and is buried the next morning on Tuesday, 23 Iyar (May 31, 2026). Every calculation below follows from the burial date, 23 Iyar.
Shiva
Seven days from burial. The burial day is day one. In our example, Shiva runs from Tuesday, 23 Iyar, and ends on the morning of the seventh day, 29 Iyar (Monday, June 6, 2026). The Haft will be Sunday night, June 5th.
A festival that falls during Shiva or Sheloshim can cancel or shorten the count, and the calculation differs for each holiday. For those cases, see Mourning and Festivities .
Sheloshim
Thirty days from burial, the burial day counting as day one. The thirtieth day is the end of Sheloshim. In our example, Sheloshim ends on 23 Sivan (Wednesday, June 29, 2026). Relatives say kaddish through Sheloshim, and may continue saying kaddish during the year when they are at a minyan.
NOTE: When the burial month has twenty‑nine days, Sheloshim falls on the same date number in the next month (23 Iyar to 23 Sivan). When the burial month has thirty days, it falls one number earlier. Because some months vary in length, confirm the date with the Hebrw Calendar converter.
The 11 Months (Son’s Kaddish)
The sons of the deceased say kaddish for eleven months. Eleven months from burial lands on the same date number eleven months later, which is one month before the first anniversary. In our example, eleven months from 23 Iyar is 23 Nisan (April 19, 2027). The last kaddish at that point is said at Mincha.
According to the Mashadi tradition, the children then pause for about three weeks and resume kaddish about a week before the anniversary, on 16 Iyar (from Arvit on Thursday night, May 11, 2027), continuing until the anniversary itself, 23 Iyar (Friday, May 19, 2027), with the last kaddish at Mincha. The pause keeps the kaddish from appearing to be a full twelve months, while still honoring the days leading up to the sal.
The Year (Sal)
The sal is the yearly anniversary.
First year: the sal follows the date of burial. In our example, the first sal is 23 Iyar 5777.
Following years: the sal follows the date of death, not the burial. In our example, from the second year on, the sal is 22 Iyar. The relatives begin saying kaddish before the sal (in the example, from Friday night, 20 Iyar 5788, May 4, 2028) and continue through the sal itself, 22 Iyar 5788 (Monday, May 7, 2028), with the last kaddish at Mincha.
Leap Years
In a Jewish leap year there are two months of Adar, Adar I and Adar II. This affects the counts in two ways. First, when a count of thirty days or eleven months passes through a leap year, include both Adars, because the year has thirteen months. Second, when the anniversary date falls in Adar: a date from Adar I stays in Adar I, a date from Adar II stays in Adar II, and a date from a regular single Adar is observed in Adar II of the leap year. These cases are easy to miscalculate. Confirm the date with the converter (https://www.hebcal.com/converter), and when in doubt, ask before fixing the date.
Visiting the Cemetery
It is customary to visit on the day of Shiva, the day of Sheloshim, at the eleven months, and every year on the sal. It is also customary to visit each year on Tisha Be’av and before Rosh Hashana or Yom Kippur. Apart from these days, it is best not to visit regularly.
We do not visit on Chol Hamoed, or Rosh Chodesh. If the last day of Shiva falls on one of these, the mourners visit afterward. If the last day of Sheloshim or the sal falls on one of these, the mourners visit either before or after.
