YITRO: Why We Ignore Good Advice

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Yitro, Moses’ father-in-law, arrives at the Israelite camp with his daughter Tzipora, Moses’ wife, and their two grandsons, Gershom and Eliezer. The reunion was very emotional. Moshe told Yitro in detail everything that happened in Egypt: the story of the ten plagues, the endless negotiations with Pharaoh, the sea opening, and how God saved them from slavery. The next day, the Tora says, Moses returned to his duties as the supreme leader and the most respected person of the people. Moses acted as mediator and arbitrator, judging his people — avoiding ion this way disputes and conflicts — from morning till night. But upon seeing this, and instead of praising him, his father-in-law criticized Moshe: “What you’re doing is wrong! … this work is too heavy for you. You won’t be able to do it alone,” he said.  Yitro didn’t limit himself to criticizing Moses. He also told Moses what to do: “delegate your power and assign more judges: an arbitrator for every ten people, one for every 50, one for every 100, and one for every 1,000.”

Before analyzing Moses’ reaction to Yitro’s criticism, let’s remember some facts. 1. Moses is no longer a child. He is over 80 years old. At that age, a man like Moses has enough experience to give advice, not to receive criticism! 2. Moses is the leader of 3 million people. Yitro, on the other hand, was not even a political leader. He was a priest in Midian, a town with many fewer people under his charge. 3. Moses is the man of the hour. As Yitro himself confessed: everyone at that time had heard about Moses. And I imagine that he was more admired among non-Jews than among Jews. Why? Because the Jews knew that God had done all these miracles, but the Gentiles would surely have thought it was all Moses’ own powers. Moshe had all the reasons in the world to reject Yitro’s advice and say: “Dear father-in-law: I greatly appreciate your concern, but please don’t interfere with what doesn’t concern you!” . Moses could have said in the best style of Bil’am’s arrogance. “God speaks to me! I am His chosen one. His spokesman. I don’t need any human advice!”


However, and in an incredible display of humility, Moses listened to his father-in-law and carried out his advice. This shows us why Moses was called by the Tora “the most humble man on the face of the earth”. Because despite being so wise, famous, and connected to God, Moses had the humility to listen to others and adopt their advice. As we once explained, when a human being comes closer to God, he better understands his own finitude, limits, and smallness. As the Chinese say, “The bamboo, the higher it grows, the deeper it bends.”

Humility is a rare and valuable quality in our modern world, where people seek to assert their dominance and knowledge by precisely rejecting listening to other people’s opinions or ideas. Absurdly, we ignore good advice because we feel it would amount to admitting that we are inferior to the one guiding us. According to modern psychologists (see this article), people often ignore good recommendations because they want to feel in control and demonstrate competence. The more an individual suffers from low self-esteem, the more arrogantly he or she will react toward advice and reject help. A person with low confidence often refuses to accept good advice, even though they know those recommendations will benefit their decisions. A small ego desperately wants to avoid being perceived as needing help, even at the price of sabotaging his own interest.


The example of Moses demonstrates that true power and wisdom come from humility, which manifests, not infrequently, in the willingness to listen to others