ASKING FORGIVENESS: The offenses that we have committed against another person are not forgiven on Yom Kippur, unless we previously ask forgiveness from the person that we have hurt or offended. We must see (or at least call or send a message to) anyone hurt or offended by us and ask for forgiveness. This includes friends, colleagues, husband and wife, and other family members. We must pay special attention to asking our parents for forgiveness.
FORGIVING: It is a beautiful gesture with great merit to unilaterally and sincerely forgive all those friends and family members who have hurt or offended us, eliminating all the negative feelings we may harbor in our hearts. Remember what the Sages explained: God forgives us in the way we forgive others. We, parents, should forgive our children in our hearts, thus preventing them from being liable for transgressing the Fifth Commandment.
EATING: On the eve of Yom Kippur we should eat and drink more than usual because eating abundantly will give us the energy and strength to fast. According to some rabbis, the extra food on the eve of Kippur “makes up” for the (Yom Tob) festive meals that we will not have on Yom Kippur. Before the fast begins, we do the se’udat hamafseqet, the last meal before fasting. We should finish eating about 15-20 minutes before sunset (in NY, sunset will be today at 6.33 pm).
TEFILA: We must review our Tefilot and try to understand what we are going to say, particularly the Viduy, confession. It is advisable to make a personal list of our wrongdoings so that we articulate them in the Viduy of Yom Kippur, and God willing to change them.
SEE HERE A PRINTABLE PDF VERSION OF THE VIDUY IN ENGLISH
TSEDAQA and KAPPAROT: It is customary to give extra charity on the eve of Yom Kippur. Practicing tsedaqa is one of the best ways to demonstrate our renewed and sincere commitment to goodness and righteousness. It is also highly recommended to do the Kapparot with Tsedaqa.
MIKVEH: It is traditional for men to immerse in the Mikve (ritual bath) on the eve of Yom Kippur. This reminds us of the Kohen Gadol, who was purified in the Mikve before performing his Sacred Service (‘abodat Yom haKippurim, see video below).
MINCHA GEDOLA: It is customary to pray Minha early in Ereb Yom Kippur. In some communities, the custom is to pray Minha of today with Talit and Tefilin. During the Amida we recite the Viduy. Then we go home to have the last meal before fasting (se’udat hamfseqet).
ADDING TIME: We must abstain from the five prohibitions of Kippur and from doing any prohibited work in Yom Kippur (melakha) approximately 15- 20 minutes before sunset, complying with the Mitsva to adding some time on the eve of Yom Kippur. For this reason, we must also delay the end of Kippur for a few minutes after nightfall.
LIGHTING CANDLES: There are different customs regarding the obligation to light candles on the eve of Yom Kippur. The opinion of Rabbi Obadya Yosef (Sepharadim, including UMJCA) and Rabbi Melamed (Ashkenazim) is that women should light the candles and say the berakha, like they do Friday evening, about 15-20 minutes before sunset (in N.Y. sunset will be at 6.33pm). The berakha is … asher qiddeshanu bemitsvotav vetsivanu lehadliq ner shel Yom haKippurim. For the Berakha Shehecheyanu, it is best that women would listen to the blessing that is said at the time of Kal Nidre. However, if they are not going to attend the services at night, they should say the blessing Shehecheyanu. To understand this topic better and to review more halachic opinions, see this excellent article).
מוצאי יום כיפור
HABDALA AT THE END OF YOM KIPPUR:
Before Yom Kippur begins, we should light a candle that will last until the end of Yom Kippur to use for the Habdalah ceremony at the end of Yom Kippur. Why should we leave the candle lit? The Habdala of Yom Kippur is different from the Habdalah we recite on a Saturday night.
At the end of Yom Kippur
1. We do not say the blessing of “Besamim”. Why? Because when Shabbat ends, we smell an aromatic plant or perfume as an expression of consolation for the sadness that the Seventh Day ended and to symbolize that we want to “retain some of the atmosphere” of Shabbat. At the end of Yom Kippur, however, we are not sad! We are actually happy because the world’s Creator has forgiven us and erased all our sins.
2. At the end of Kippur, to recite the blessing Bore Meore HaEesh, we need a candle that has been lit before Yom Kippur began (ner sheshabat). Why? Because the purpose of this blessing after Kippur ends is to point out that previously we could not use the fire from that candle to cook or to light other candles, as we do, for example, on a Yom Tob. When we recite this berakha, we recognize the difference (= habdalah) between Yom Kippur and an ordinary day or even a regular Yom Tob. For this reason, if we do not have a candle lit before Yom Kippur, we should not say the blessing Bore Meore Haesh. It is customary to leave a ner neshama (a Yizkor candle), or any candle that will last more than 24 hours before Kippur to use for this purpose.
תזכו לשנים רבות
All you need to know about fasting on Yom Kippur; who does not need to fast; fasting for pregnant and nursing mothers; and how to eat when you cannot fast. See here
Class on Prayers of Yom Kippur HERE
|
|
|
|
|
|
