KI TETSE: To forgive or not to forgive?

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MISHNE TORA, HILKHOT TESHUBA: Chapter 2, Halacha 10.
“It is forbidden for a Yehudi to be cruel and refuse to forgive. Rather, one should be easy to forgive and hard to get angry. And when a person who wronged asks you for forgiveness, you must forgive him with a full heart and a willing spirit. … you should not seek revenge or hold a grudge. This is the way of the children of Israel and their right spirit. “
PERASHAT KI TETSE. Chapter 25: 17-19
17 Remember what the Amaleqites did to you, along the way when you came out of Egypt. 18 When he assaulted you on the way, attacking those who were left behind …. and had no fear of God. 19 When HaShem your God gives you rest from all your enemies around, in the land that gives you to possess as an inheritance, you shall erase the name of Amaleq from under heaven. Do not forget!
These two texts present two different and conflicting ideas about forgiveness. On the one hand, as we are learning these days dedicated to the Teshuba, we must forgive and forget. On the other hand, the Tora portion of this week, KI TETSE, virtually forbids us to “forget”. We can not forgive what Amaleq did to us. How should we reconcile this contradiction? So, what should we do: forgive and forget or hold a grudge and remember?
We are a nation that unfortunately was, is, and will be, persecuted. The reasons and justifications for these eternal persecutions are more excuses than motives.   Anti-Semitism is an unjustified hatred. The first example, the archetype of this baseless hatred, was Amaleq.  Amaleq attacked Israel for no reason. The people of Israel, who were coming out from Egypt, were not a threat to Amaleq. Israel did not have any plan to conquer their land or take their possessions. Amaleq’s attack was not provoked by Israel. In addition, Amaleq did not wage a frontal war against Israel –army against army. Amaleq assaulted from behind, attacked those who were more vulnerable and walked slower: the elderly, the weak, and the sick. In other words, Amaleq attacked deliberately those who could not defend themselves. It was not a conventional war. It was a cowardly terrorist attack. Like the bombing of the Sbarro pizzeria in Jerusalem, 2001, or the attack on the AMIA in Buenos Aires, 1994.
Amaleq is synonymous with the “national enemy” of the Jewish people. Amaleq, unfortunately (and unbelievably!), did not disappear. Amaleq changes its skin and its name. But its Judeophobic essence remains unchanged. When the Catholic Kings expelled nearly half a million Jews from Spain, in 1492, leading them to certain death, they claimed it was justified to protect the “conversos” (those who covered to Christianity under duress) from the influence of the Jews. But if that was the case, why did they also demand to expel 120,000 Jews from Portugal? Why the Spaniards also persecuted and try to destroy the Jews when they conquered North Africa or the Americas? What conversos were the Jews influencing there? Were the Jews a threat to Germany in 1939? They were professionals, intellectuals, highly qualified scientists, or successful merchants who contributed to the German economy. And what threat Poland or Hungary Jews represented to Germany? The Shoah was another manifestation, the worst in history, of the philosophy of hatred of Amaleq.
In our modern days, Iran relentlessly threatens to wipe Israel off the map. But did you ever ask yourself why would Iran want to eliminate Israel? When did Israel provoke Iran? Is there, perhaps, a territorial conflict between Iran and Israel? Israel and Iran are pretty far apart! There are two countries that separate Israel from Iran: Syria or Jordan, and Iraq. There are no borders in common between Israel and Iran. They are as separated from each other, as Argentina is from Colombia. It’s unbelievable that there is so little talk about the absolute lack of justification for Iran’s hatred of Israel. Iran is nothing but a new version of Amaleq
There are many more examples, sadly, than those I just mentioned here. But I think this is enough to clarify the difference between two types of “enemies”, and thus solve the apparent contradiction between the two texts mentioned above.
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Judaism distinguishes between the “social” and the “national” enemy.
The “social enemy” is only temporary: to be angry, is somehow “natural”, but I cannot stay mad at my friends, colleagues, family, etc. forever. If we fought, or if my friend offended me, this “enmity” should go away fast. We have to develop a willingness to let go, forgive, and forget, without holding grudges. In these cases, we are commanded to turn the page.
However, toward the “national enemy”, when a gentile nation behaves like Amaleq, the Tora commands us in this week Perasha exactly the opposite. “Remember, and do not forget.” Because Amaleq will not improve its ways when we forgive him.  They will become stronger. Because our forgiveness is interpreted as weakness, and it energizes their hatred. Forgetting Amaleq can cost us our life. It is our duty, as a nation, to never lower our guard with Amaleq. While we won’t forget Amaleq, we will be on a state of alert against Amaleq. And vice versa. The rest is up to Hashem.