PIRQE ABOT 3:1: The sleeping rider syndrome

דע מאין באת ….

Where do you come from? Where are you going to? WHO are you going to be facing when you report what you have done with your life?

In this Mishna, ‘Aqabiya ben Mahalalel reminds us of the exciting topic of the interaction between body and soul. He says that the best way to avoid committing a transgression is to remember that my body comes from something that is materially insignificant ( “a fetid drop …”), and it also goes to nowhere ( “…food for worms”). In contrast, my soul has a nature that is not material. It is not made of atoms, molecules or cells. It will not die or disappear. It will survive the death of my body. My soul, in other words, is “I, less my body.” After life, my soul has absolute awareness of its identity (it knows that it’s “I”) , preserves my memory (knows the things I did with my life) and my conscience (feels righteous, if I led a righteous life). And, therefore, my soul can and should be held accountable by the Supreme Judge for whatever I may have accomplished during my earthly existence, when my soul, in other words “I”, was integrated with my body.

I recognize that it is very difficult to speak or describe the soul, because as we said, it is not an organ of the body or a physical part of the brain. I have always tried to find a metaphor which could help visualize better what the soul is, in itself and in relation to the body.

For a long time I thought that body and soul could be compared to a car and its driver. The car is the body and the soul the driver conducting the body. Then it occurred to me that it would be more accurate to speak of a taxi (or an Uber.). The car is our body, the driver is our brain and the passenger is ME, I, my soul. The driver knows how to drive the car, and how to bring the passenger by the best possible way, etc. but the driver cannotdecide for himself where to go… It is the passenger who needs to make that decision and determine the final destination!

I think that, although slightly better than the first, the metaphor of the taxi is far from “perfect”. What I think is better to illustrate the nature of the soul and its interaction with the body is the motif of the horse and the rider. The rider, obviously, is the soul. And the horse is the body. The rider needs the horse to reach his goal and reach the final destination. A conscientious rider knows the horse has material needs and he makes sure not to neglect them. The rider feeds the horse, gives it to drink, allows it to rest, takes it often to the vet, and sometimes spoils it. He does everything possible to satisfy his horse’s needs and to keep it as strong and healthy as possible. This is the ideal scenario in which rider and horse are interdependent, cooperate with each other, synergizing.

But there are less ideal scenarios. For example: What if the rider does not know where to go, or if he feels that there is no goal to reach, and therefore the rider just has to “kill time”, find something for the horse to do and just the allows the horse to wander aimlessly? What happens when the rider cannot control his horse, gives up and ends up loosening the horse’s reins? Probably the worst case scenario, and perhaps the most common one, is when the rider never gets that he is a rider, an independent entity separate from his horse. In other words, what if the rider never realizes and is lost or confused about his identity and feels more like a centaur (those half-men, half-horse of Greek mythology) than like a rider on horseback?

In all these cases, unlike the case of the taxi driver who will not move from his place until the passenger tells him where to go, the horse, having a life of its own, would live the life of a horse. Its existential concern will be to find the best-quality grass and accumulate as much as possible of it. The horse will rest whenever it feels like it, and will run through the meadows without any specific goal, chasing female horses or anything else that appeals to it. The horse will not stay idle, waiting for orders from a sleeping rider…

The Tora teaches us that we are riders, and as such we must be constantly aware that there is a NON-MATERIAL goal to achieve. It also teaches us, through a lot of Mitsvot, how to feed our horse, how to avoid whatever is damaging for it, when let our horse rest, and how to tame and control it. How to keep our horse healthy and strong, so it is able to take us to our destination. And knowing that someday we will go down from our horse, bid a grateful farewell and continue our way, from the point that, with the horse’s help, we were able to achieve.

PIRQE ABOT 3:1: Integrity, without exceptions

In the third chapter of Pirqe Abot we find Aqabiya ben Mahalalel, a prominent rabbi of the time of the Mishna, who lived during the first half of the first century of the Common Era. Before examining what he has said, let’s see something about the unique personality of Aqabiya ben Mahalalel.

Aqabiya was famous for his extreme loyalty to his teachers and his solid moral integrity, which was tested on more than one occasion. What most marked the life of Aqabiya was that he maintained his view on four rabbinic subjects (טומאת שער הפקודה, דם ירוק and other themes that we will not describe because they are very technical issues) against the view of his colleagues. We know that, on the one hand, we must be faithful to the traditions we have received from our elders, and that loyalty to the received tradition is absolutely critical in the teacher-student relationship. Teachers are confident that their students will follow their steps, and disciples considered a matter of honor to convey the tradition received from their teachers. On the other hand, as we know, many times different opinions arise among the rabbis–similar to the differences between judges or legislators of any country–and when those differences are not resolved within the framework of the rabbinical debate , the matter is submitted to vote and the court would respect and adopt the majority’s opinion. In the case of Aqabiya ben Mahalalel, these two principles, loyalty to one’s teachers and following the opinion of the majority of Rabbis, collided, came into conflict: on one hand, his teachers taught him to follow opinion A, while most rabbis of his generation held view B. Aqabiya’s colleagues urged him to reconsider and change his mind, but he refused. Then the rabbis made him an irresistible offer: knowing that Aqabiya had sufficient knowledge, good name and merits for the job, they offered him that, would he change his mind, he would be assigned as the Chairman of the Highest Rabbinical of Israel! To everyone’s surprise, Aqabiya rejected the offer. He said, “I’d rather be taken for a fool for the rest of my days (for not accepting that deal) than leading anyone to ever believe that I’m a corrupt person (for accepting that “sweet” deal)” …מוטב לי ליקרות שוטה כל ימי.

Interestingly, before Aqabiya died he told his son that he should follow the opinion of the majority of the rabbis, and not his father’s opinion. His son asked, “But father, all your life you kept your opinion, and you are asking me now to follow the opposite view.” To which Aqabiya replied: “I received the tradition of my teachers, who in those days were the majority. And my colleagues followed the opinion of their teachers …But you my dear son, you just received the tradition from me, an individual. My colleagues are now the majority, and you must respect the new leaders and adopt their opinion … “

The Gemara also tells an episode, very relevant for today, which demonstrates the limitless integrity of this illustrious Hakham. At the end of the days of Aqabiya, his son asked him a very “common” favor. He said something like this: “Dear father, you are very well respected, loved and admired among the Hakhamim. Your colleagues would do anything for you. I ask you please to recommend me, and talk about me to any of your friends, so I can have an easier access to a position of prominence.” Then, Aqabiya ben Mahalalel formulated one of the most famous Rabbinic statements of all times, four Hebrew words that became the highest standard of moral integrity and the rejection of nepotism, traffic of influence and other similar forms of corruption. His words were, verbatim, מעשיך יקרבוך ומעשיך ירחיקוך, which means: “Your own actions will bring you closer (to the position you aspire) or will you drive away (from that position).” In other words: I’ll not recommend you to my colleagues. What really matters is your merits, not your family connections. Your merits will bring you to the position you so long. Your actions are your best recommendation. It is about your deeds, not my influence.

PIRQE ABOT 1:1: On Justice and Education

הוו מתונים בדין והעמידו תלמידים הרבה ועשו סייג לתורה

The first Mishna of Pirque Abot brings us back to the time of Anshe Keneset Hagedola, the Great Assembly, which was formed when the Jews returned from Babylon to Jerusalem around the 5th century before the common era.

With this Mishnah, the Great Assembly seems to have had three strategic goals. We will explain two of them:

First, issuing a wake-up call to the Jewish judges. The legal stature of a country, and the level of justice in any society, is measured by the moral level of its judges. If judges in a society are bribable, corrupt, or even negligent, that society will not succeed. In this regard, Anshe Keneset Hagedola did not need to mention the honesty expected from Jewish judges, a trait that had always been a given with the judges of ‘Am Israel. Rather, their focus was on the level of care and diligence judges should have when issuing a verdict. They advised the judges to be measured in justice (הוו מתונים בדין), which means that they should not rush, should examine all the evidence and testimony carefully and only then arrive at their final conclusion.

Rabbi Duran adds something very interesting in his commentary: the fact that we should not rush to a verdict does not mean that justice should be delayed unnecessarily. For example, if all the evidence is clear, decisive and evident, there is no need for undue delay. In fact, if a judge delays a verdict when the evidence is absolutely clear, it would be a corruption of justice. Deliberately slow justice is corrupt justice.

Second, the men of the Great Assembly discussed the issue of education. Rabbi Duran explains that this has always been debated among Jewish sages. A segment of Rabbis opined that only certain qualified persons should be accepted as students. For example, some centuries later, the great sage Shammai (50 BCE – 30 CE) said he would only accept an intelligent, humble student, from a good family and in good financial situation (this last requirement was meant to ensure the student would not leave his studies prematurely needing to seek sustenance). Later on, Rabban Gamliel also argued for accepting as students only those persons who are honest and have integrity (תוכו כברו), because a dishonest person could use his knowledge of Torah to deceive people, which would be deemed a desecration of God’s name. On the other hand, Hillel and, a little later, Ribbi El’azar ben ‘Azariah, thought that Torah should be taught also to persons with imperfect past or those who did not have outstanding character traits, because what tends to happen is that the studying of Tora transforms the student for the better.

In brief, Jewish sages seem to always have had this debate between those who thought that the Tora (and the knowledge and prestige that come to those who study it) might be misused by students who lack the necessary moral prerequisites, while others believed that the possibility of abuse is remote given that the Tora is not informational but rather educational, it is knowledge that transforms us into better human beings. One could say that, eventually, the latter group won the day. As the Mishna says “…and raise numerous students…”

Rabbi Duran concludes from this Mishna an idea that reminds me of the concept of natural selection. Rabbi Duran said that an institution should generally accept 100 average students if it wants to produce 10 outstanding students. And from these 10 outstanding students, it should expect that only one or two will be truly prodigious, the rabbinic leaders of each generation. And, therefore, in order to produce the one or two leaders that each generation needs, it is necessary to not restrict too much the admission of students to rabbinical academies..

PIRQE ABOT: The ideal Jew

כי ידוע הוא שהמעלה הגדולה אשר אין אחריה מעלה היא שיהיה האדם טוב לשמים וטוב לבריות

מגן אבות לרשב”ץ , הקדמה

Rabbi Shimon Duran (Rashbets, 1361-1444) explains in his introduction to the commentary of Pirqe Abot, Magen Abot, that the reason we study this Mishna before Shabuot, is to prepare ourselves to reach the level of “Hasidut”.

“Hasid” is translated today as pious, or is usually associated with a movement of followers of a prominent rabbinical figure. We will see now how Rabbi Duran defined the concept of “Hasid” in his book. Rabbi Duran quotes the Gemara in Qiddushin 40a saying that we might find a man that is a “tsadiq”, a righteous man, but not a good man. For example, when someone is very scrupulous in his relationship with God, but does not behave well towards his or her peers. Rabbi Duran explains that “the highest level, above which there is no other level, is when a person is good toward HaShem and good toward other people. And when a Yehudi reaches this ideal level he is called “Hasid”. “Hasid”, in other words, is the highest level a Jew should aspire to reach.

Let’s see now how Rabbi Duran describes in detail the characteristics of a Hasid.

1. CONNECTION WITH HASHEM

The ideal Jew must be in permanent contact with God. Since you’re up in the morning until you go to bed at night, you must have the name of HaShem in your lips. Praying three times a day, reciting the berakhot every time you eat, and studying Tora during throughout the day and at night. Rabbi Duran mentions that the epitome (the highest level, the almost “utopian”) connection with HaShem was reached by the “Hasidim Rishonim”, the “old Hasidim” mentioned by the Mishna Berakhot. They used to meditate at length in their prayers, a task that took nine hours of their day. The first element that you must develop in order to be a Hasid is a very strong relationship with God. Having HaShem constantly in your heart, mind and lips. However, if a Jew only dedicates to cultivate his or her relationship with God, he is NOT considered a Hasid, an ideal or complete Jew. There are two other dimensions to be developed to achieve this ideal.

2. INTEGRITY

The Gemara in Baba Qama 30a tells us that the “Hasidim Rishonim”, the same Jews who prayed nine hours a day, were also very scrupulous in their ethical behavior. These Hasidim, the Gemara says, were extremely careful not to steal or to cause any harm to anyone. The example mentioned by the Gemara, incredibly modern, illustrates how did the Hasidim Rishonim get rid of their broken glass or branches with thorns. While normal people would simply hide this type of waste superficially with a little soil, the Hasidim Rishonim dug a hole of at least 1 foot deep, and would placed there the broken glasses and thorns, to avoid causing any harm, even to those who perhaps years later might be working that parcel with their plow. These Hasidim were extremely careful in avoiding any direct or indirect harm or injury to others.

3. GEMILUT HASADIM

The third element that characterized the Hasidim Rishonim was “kindness”, hesed, acts of goodness. Do not forget that the word “Hasid” comes from the word “Hesed”. Hesed means my predisposition to help other people, even if they have not asked for my help. Sometimes Hesed consists in helping others with financial assistance (tsedaqa). Many other times, people need a different type of assistance, which cannot be bought or replace with money: for example, visiting a sick person, encouraging him, and bringing a word of encouragement and hope, is not something you can do with money, but with your “presence”and with your time. The same can be said of nihum abelim, comforting the relatives of someone who has just died. What brings comfort to the bereaved is our presence. Something similar happens when we invite people to our house for dinner on Shabbat, etc, hakhnasat orehim, we do not offer money but company, sharing time together. We do acts of Hesed, goodness, either with our money (tsedaqa) or with our presence and our time (gemilut hasadim).

Rabbi Duran gives us a good definition of what does it mean to be a role-model Jew. On the one hand, building and maintaining an ongoing relationship with HaShem, and on the other hand, being extremely honest, caring and above all generous and sensitive, doing everything in our power to help others, with our means and with our time.

Rabbi Duran concludes: Why should we study Pirqe Abot? Because this treatise of Mishna contains the advices of our sages to become a real “hasid”, the best possible Jew with HaShem and with one’s peers.

PIRQE ABOT 4:22 The afterlife and the library

Yesterday we explained the words of Rabbi Yaaqob: this life is a preparation for the life to come.

Today, we are going to expand a little more on this idea.

In this Mishna, Rabbi Yaaqob says something that seems surprising. He compares our life with life after death and he says that this life is more important than the next.

He says: “It is more valuable a moment of repentance and good deeds in this world, than the entire life of the world to come.”

What did Rabbi Yaaqob mean? The most essential virtue of man, what distinguishes man from the animals and angels, is man’s free will. Man can choose to do good or to do evil, to grow spiritually or to stagnate. To be selfish or altruistic. It is thanks to this “freedom of choice” that we make our moral decisions: Will I or will I not help someone who needs me? Will I or I will not speak ill of so and so? Will I or will I not steal, hurt, heal, apologize, forgive?

Free will is an exclusive prerogative of mortals. In the world to come we do not make moral decisions. There are no poor who needs help, nor sick who needs visitors, not physical people to speak ill of them or conspiring against them. No money to steal, nor the possibility of being faithful or unfaithful, cruel or compassionate.

Rabbi Yaaqob main message to us is that our development and spiritual growth consists in making these moral decisions throughout our life. We are what we have decided to do in our lives. And the better those decisions are, the more our souls grows, and vice versa. Rabbi Ya’aqob also emphasizes the idea of Teshuba, repentance. In the world to come there is no possibility of repentance. Only here, in this life, we can ask forgiveness from God for having violated His will, and only in this life we have the opportunity to apologize to those whom we have offended. In the world to come there is no possibility of change, progress, growth or repentance. That’s why, in this sense, life in this world is incomparably more meaningful than the life in the next world.

Imagine that the world to come is a beautiful library, containing books, only books. The most beautiful books in the world are in this library. In this life, you have the opportunity to learn to read, in any language you want, so when you get to the library you can enjoy the most fabulous works of human literature. But this library has some limitations: there are no audiobooks there and no one to teach you how to read. “Reading” can only be learned before one enters into the library.The example of the library serves also to understand what Rabbi Ya’aqob said regarding the greater importance of this world, compared to the world to come.

Incidentally this illustration also helps us to understand why the Mishna never speaks of paradise or hell, but only of the world to come, as if it was one and the same place for the righteous and for the wicked. Two people come to the library. The first person learned several languages and appreciates a good reading. Now in the library he has access to all the books he wants. He is in paradise! The other person knows a lot about politics and sports, and he is an expert in playing poker and video games. But he is illiterate. He never wanted to invest some time to learn how to read. The two people are in the same place … and yet, they are not in the same place. The literate man is in paradise. The other one, is not.

PIRQE ABOT: Rabbi Yaaqob and the game of the three lives

רבי יעקב אומר, העולם הזה דומה לפרוזדור בפני העולם הבא.

התקן עצמך בפרוזדור, כדי שתכנס לטרקלין

Rabbi Ya’aqob used to say that this life is like a lobby compared to the world to come. Prepare yourself in the lobby before entering into the main lounge!

When someone goes to visit an important person who is waiting, for example, in the VIP lounge of a Hotel on the seventh floor, most probably upon entering the Hotel one you will surely fix his tie, make sure his shirt is inside its pants, or if is a woman she would probably check her makeup in the mirror of the elevator and look at herself again and again to make sure she looks as presentable as possible.

This is the metaphor that rabbi Ya’aqob has chosen to visualize the relationship between this life and the next. This metaphor is a bit “tough”, mainly because it makes us think more realistically about the (desperate) brevity of our lives, which we usually realize after living for more than a few years …. Our lives are as brief as the moment that passes from the hotel lobby to the VIP lounge … But beyond this existential reflection, the essence of this metaphor is to help us understand the reason of our existence in this world: we are here to prepare ourselves for our life after death.

I’ll try to paraphrase the words of Rabbi Ya’aqob with my own words.

We live three lives.

Life 1: in the womb.

Life 2: this life.

Life 3: life after life.

* In this progression, each life is more meaningful and richer than the other. Life 2 is richer than life 1, and life 3 richer than life 2.

* There is an insurmountable problem: from the previous life we cannot know anything about the life to come. The next life is “unimaginable”. Can you imagine a baby visualizing his or her next life, our world? All she can imagine is that the next life is a much larger placenta!

* And now let’s see what rabbi Ya’aqob says: Each of these lives is a preparation for the life to come. Life in the womb is only a preparation for our present life. We are conceived and our bodies are formed in life 1 only to be used in this life. Our nose, our eyes and our mouths have no meaning, nor practical use in the womb. These organs and virtually all of our body can only be understood and justified in terms of the next life, life 2. Similarly, our “spiritual” growth in life 2, the lobby of Yaaqob, is fully understood only in terms of our arrival to the VIP lounge, life 3.

Now, there is a fundamental difference between life 1 vis-à-vis life 2, and life 2 vis-à-vis life 3. And this is the message of Rabbi Ya’aqob. While in Life 1 our body automatically prepares itself for life 2, in life 2 our preparation is not automatic or natural: it depends completely on ourselves, on our moral decisions and on the investment we do or fail to do in our spiritual life. That is why Rabbi Ya’aqob uses the imperative: “Prepare yourself” to enter into the lounge!!! Because what is potentially tragic is that one can live life 2 without doing absolutely nothing for life 3.

(To be continued …)

Giving the benefit of the doubt…when we should not

Yesterday we explained that giving the benefit of the doubt is one of the 613 commandments of the Tora. We also explored the benefits of judging others with kindness: achieving a state of inner peace; living in harmony with those around us, and knowing that, as our Sages assert, God judges me and will judge me using the same yardstick I used to judge others.

But, is giving the benefit of the doubt an absolute value?

The Tora teaches us that we must judge the average man as we would judge the man of absolute integrity: in an ambiguous situation, in a case where I don’t have all the information at hand, I should give the average man some credit and judge him positively. However, the Tora also tells us that there are exceptions to this rule. In fact, the Tora states that we can not and should not judge the rasha’ (the wicked), the person who has a negative immoral record, with the benefit of the doubt. That would be dangerous. If I give the benefit of the doubt to the rasha’, instead of being a good person I will be crossing the line into being a naive, virtually reckless, person.

The example I will present to the reader has to do with international politics. Simply because I found it easier to explain this profound concept with such example. Besides, the reader will appreciate that the principles of the Tora, in this case the limitations of “the benefit of the doubt”, are suitable and applicable also beyond our private lives.

Let us talk about Iran.

Iran wants to make a deal with the United States and a few other world powers. Iran declares that its nuclear plants will be used for peaceful purposes. The are some doubts about Iran’s real intentions. The question is whether the US should grant Iran the benefit of the doubt and trust that Iran will actually keep its word.

The Tora tells us unequivocally that we should not grant the benefit of the doubt to those who have a negative record.

Let us examine the case of Iran in light of this criteria.

1. Currently, Iran is anything but a peaceful country. At this time, as explained by the Israeli news agency Debka (see this), Iran is involved in four simultaneous wars, and none of them is a war of defense. These are all wars in which Iran chooses to get involved to extend its influence in the region. Iran is involved in the Lebanon war, in the war in Syria, in the war in Iraq, and most recently in the war in Yemen. All these wars have a very high cost in human lives!

2. As explained by the Prime Minister of Israel, Iran is behind numberless terrorist attacks, among them the bombing of the AMIA in Buenos Aires, Argentina.

3. Iran has stated on numerous occasions that it wants to wipe Israel off the map, and Iran never backed down from this threat.

We can give many more examples, but I think with this record it’s sufficient to establish a pattern and to assert that giving Iran the benefit of the doubt would be reckless and dangerous. In cases like this the Tora tells me NOT to give the benefit of the doubt.

Now, is the wicked doomed forever to be judged unfavorably? Could we ever judge the bad guy in a favorable light? If an individual, or in this case a country, changes and improves, not only with words but mainly with deeds, then we should reconsider it.

Let’s continue with the example of Iran:

Imagine Iran would declare today: “We want to use our nuclear plants for peaceful purposes.” And immediately gets rid of all nuclear weapons it has already accumulated. Then Iran ends its involvement in the wars with its neighbors. Not only that, Iran also admits its responsibility in the AMIA bombing, apologizes and offers a compensation to the families of the victims. And as if that were not enough, Iran retracts from its threats against Israel and offers to open its embassy in Jerusalem.

A series of actions in the right direction would change the status quo of a person, an institution or a country. But until that happens, giving the benefit of the doubt in a case like this is nothing but suicidal.

In conclusion: Judging the benefit of the doubt demands moral clarity. The clarity needed to identify evil, violence and injustice.

SHABBAT SHALOM

Candlelighting in NYC 7:32 pm

Shabbat ends in NYC 8:33 pm

PIRQE ABOT: Giving the benefit of the doubt, unlimited

והוי דן את כל האדם לכף זכות

“Yehoshua ben Perahia used to say, make for yourself a teacher, invest in a friend, and judge others with the benefit of the doubt.“

Giving others the benefit of the doubt is a Mitsva of the Tora. Where does this Mitzva appear? In the book of Vayiqra 19:15 it says: betsedeq tishpot ‘ amitekha, “With righteousness you shall judge your neighbor.”

This is how our Hakhamim explained this Mitsva:

There are 3 categories of people: the righteous man, the evil man and the average man.

The righteous or tsadiq is the person with an impeccable record of good deeds. Those who are more angels than human. Not many. Perhaps, they are 5% of the population. perhaps less. On the other extreme we have the resha’im, or wicked, selfish individuals with a record of immoral deeds. Perhaps they are 5% of the total population (the book “The sociopath next door,” says that sociopaths are 4% of the population) perhaps more. And then we have the average guy, people like you and me. Individuals who usually have noble intentions. People who do good things, but also wrong things. Sometimes act selfishly and sometimes altruistically. This is 90% of the population.

The Torah says three things:

1. You have to judge the righteous man, the tsadiq , indulgently. Even when you perceive a suspicious situation, while not having all the incriminatory evidence before you, you shall judge the righteous man with the benefit of the doubt.

2. The bad guy o rasha’ . This is the person with a proven record of acting immoraly and in bad faith You can not give this person the benefit of the doubt while he does not repent or improves his deeds. You must be suspicious, even when it seems he wants to do something noble (more on this point, BH tomorrow).

3. And what about the average man? The incredible novelty of the Tora is that it tells you: JUDGE THE AVERAGE PERSON ASYOU JUDGE THE TSADIQ,, THE RIGHTEOUS PERSON. Give the average person the benefit of the doubt, unless otherwise proven. In other words, this Mitsva, “with justice you shall judge your neighbor” could be read as saying: “judge your neighbor (=the average man) as you would judge the righteous man (the tsadiq)”. Thus, according to the Torah, we must judge leniently virtually everyone!

Giving the benefit of the doubt has its great benefits.

Here’s why.

LESHON HARA: When we speak ill of others (leshon hara’), many times we just echo what we have heard about other people, without even knowing if that is true or false. If we learn to judge others with the benefit of the doubt, we will avoid repeating these type of gossip, or even better, we will not give credit to the negative things we hear about that person. If we internalize this principle we will avoid many types of leshon hara’.

BAMIDDA SHEADAM MODED … “With the same yardstick that we judge others, we will be judged by Heaven.” How do we want to be judged by God, after 120 years? Do we expect Him to judge us harshly or leniently? Surely we want the Heavenly Court to find mitigating factors that will excuse our many mistakes. We want to be judged with kindness and understanding. Well, I have good news! The Hakhamim explain that God will judge us using the same yardstick we use to judge others. If we learn to judge others with kindness and benevolence, so will God judge us. I should add that not only God judges us as we judge others: usually our gestures and attitudes are reflected and imitated by the people around us, our co-workers, friends, and family. If you want to be judged by other with indulgence, if you do not want people to rush and condemn you before having all the information at hand, then learn to give others the benefit of the doubt.

The way we are judged by people, mirrors the way we judge them.

(To be continued …)

PIRQE ABOT: Understanding the concept of benefit of the doubt

והוי דן את כל האדם לכף זכות

“Yehoshua ben Perahia used to say, make for yourself a teacher, invest in a friend, and judge others with the benefit of the doubt.“

Judging with the benefit of the doubt is, first of all, one of the 613 commandments of the Tora. And it can also be considered as one of the most important elements of Jewish morality.

This principle should be analyzed in depth and with patience. Therefore, we will devote to it more than one entry, to explore it and understand it well.

First, we will define this concept as reflected in PIRQUE ABOT and give some examples of it. Second, B’H tomorrow, we will see where and how it appears in the Tora. And third, we will explore the exceptions to the rule, that is, under what circumstances we should not give the benefit of the doubt.

Giving the benefit of the doubt means that when I do not know the whole scenario, or all the circumstances surrounding an action that seems to be wrong, I should not rush to judge that act or the person involved in it, negatively. Rather, I should try to find in my mind mitigating factors, possible or hypothetical reasons or scenarios that would justify this action that seems to be wrong.

Example: I have a date or a meeting with someone, and he or she is late. There are two possible ways to react to this event, before knowing the facts. One, I judge this person negatively and think of him or her as careless, negligent and irresponsible. The second option is thinking within myself that most probably he is late because of something beyond his control. Probably, he was stuck in traffic, or she cannot find parking, etc. This is to judge giving the benefit of the doubt.

At this point, we don’t really care what the real reason for that person’s delay was. We are not in a fact-finding mission. We are now analyzing my initial reaction, my character, to determine if I judge others in a critical way, or with the benefit of the doubt.

Unfortunately, we are not “programmed” to give the benefit of the doubt. In general, we tend to judge others by their actions, while we judge ourselves by our intentions. It seems that our western culture educated us to be rather suspicious. The Tora, however, invites us to change this attitude, to “re-program ourselves” and judge others with indulgence.

Another example: I’m giving a speech and at the end of the hall I see a familiar face talking nonstop with another person, probably a guest. At the end of my speech I approach my friend to reproach him for his bad behavior, but before I could utter a word he says, “Hi rabbi, I want to introduce you to my cousin Gerard, from Paris. I was translating to him your speech, and he loved it” .

From my pulpit and from my judging standpoint, I only saw two people talking, undermining my lecture, and the first thing that crossed my mind is that these were two inconsiderate individuals… I did not judge them with the benefit of the doubt.

Judging with the benefit of the doubt, in Hebrew לשפוט לכף זכות, is the ability to develop a positive, trusting disposition towards people. It is NOT a method to find the truth, but a Mitsva and an attitude to achieve and maintain inner peace.

(To be continued ...)

PIRQE ABOT: Who wants to be a Hasid?

כי ידוע הוא שהמעלה הגדולה אשר אין אחריה מעלה היא שיהיה האדם טוב לשמים וטוב לבריות

מגן אבות לרשב”ץ, הקדמה

Rabbi Shimon Duran (Rashbets, 1361-1444) explains in his commentary to Pirqe Abot that the reason we study this treatise of the Mishna before Shabuot is to reach the level of “Hasid”. “Hasid” is usually translated by pious, or devoted Jew. Or more popularly as “ultra-religious”. Let’s see now how Rabbi Duran understood the concept of “Hasid” 600 years ago.

The Hasid stands at a level above that of the Tsadiq, the righteous man. Rabbi Duran quotes the Gemara in Qiddushin 40a that says that a person could be a “non-righteous tsadiq” . For instance, if someone is very meticulous in his relationship with God, but does not behave well towards people, or vice versa. Rabbi Duran explains that “the highest level of religious observance, above which there is no other level, is when a Yehudi is simultaneously good to HaShem and good to other people.” If one of these two dimensions does not exist, religious observance is incomplete. The Hasid is the Yehudi who observes the commandments toward God, and he also behaves correctly, with love and concern for others. This idea is based on two texts of the Gemara where the concept of “Hasid” appears.

In the Gemara Berakhot the Rabbis said that the “First Hasidim” (that is, the epitome of the role model individuals of the Jewish people) use to pray for three hours, three times a day. In other words, they spent most of the day praying to God. From here we see that one can not be a Hasid if he or she does not maintain a deep and close relationship with HaShem.

On the other hand, another Gemara mentions the Hasidim Rishonim, those who were praying nine hours per day, in a different scene, as role models of a strict moral behavior. The example that the Gemara brings is incredibly modern. These Hasidim, the Gemara in Baba Qama 30a says, were very careful in the way they disposed of their garbage. If they had to get rid of broken glass or thorny branches, they would dig a hole three feet deep and threw this type of garbage there, so that no damage would occur to anyone, not even to someone who years later would be plowing that parcel of land.

This selfless love for people, which translates into the desire to avoid causing harm to others, is what earned them the name of Hasidim (remember that the word “Hasid” comes from “Hesed”, which means “kindness”, “doing good deeds for other people”).

In this way, rabbi Duran says, the Gemara gives us a complete and full picture of what it means to be a “Hasid” . On the one hand, whoever wants to be a Hasid must build and maintain a very close connection with HaShem. And on the other hand, he or she must love people and be very careful in dealing with others, doing everything in his power to help and to avoid causing harm to another human being, directly or indirectly.

Rabbi Duran now concludes: Why studying Pirqe About as a preparation for receiving the Tora? Because this Mishna contains the words of the Rabbis as to how to become a Hasid, in other words, how to be a good Jew with God and with our neighbor.