We the sheep
ROSH HASHANA: We and the Judge
Admitting that we don’t know…
Today is the 8th day of Elul, 5770
Hakarat haChet, acknowledging our mistakes, is the first step of the process of Teshuba (repentance and change).
One of the reasons admitting our mistakes becomes so challenging is because we usually act as our own judges… and we don’t know any better!
Let me offer you a personal illustration:
English is my third language. My English grammar skills are not that strong. While writing I make many mistakes, but I’m not aware of most of them. Once I wrote “If you’re seating…” instead of “sitting”… Before I send the group email I always check the spelling. Nothing was wrong! I read it a second and a third time. Everything looked fine ‘to me’… The truth is that I had no chance to correct myself because I didn’t know the difference between writing ‘seating’ and ‘sitting’! My ignorance –voluntary ignorance to a certain extent- prevented any improvement in my actions!
So, what is the solution?
Improve your ‘knowledge’! Learning more English will help me to be more perceptive and will empower me to detect future mistakes.
The same is true with Judaism. I want to do Teshuba. I want to become a better Jew. Then, first: I’ve to learn more about Judaism. Otherwise, it’s a catch-22: I think I know, but I don’t know any better, how am I supposed to improve myself?
Learning Tora is a prerequisite to detecting our flaws and improving ourselves.
Regret After Drinking: Four Scenarios
THE HIGHEST LEVEL OF TESHUBA
In his book Menorat haMaor, Rabbi Isaac Abohab, who lived in Spain during the 14th century, writes (p. 668-669) that there are seven levels of Teshuba or repentance. These levels are divided according to the timing and circumstances of the act of repentance. That is, when and why does repentance take place? The first level of Teshuba, which is also the highest and most effective, is when one regrets what he or she did wrong immediately, on his own initiative, without the intervention of third parties, and without being motivated by external factors. When this happens, says Rabbi Abohab, it is an indication that this individual’s conscience is awake and active.
DRINKING AND REGRETTING
We will try to understand a little better this profound idea.
Imagine a person who drinks too much alcohol and gets drunk.
In the first scenario, this individual drives his car, goes through a red light, is stopped by the police, is fined and his driver’s license is taken away. Under these circumstances, this individual surely regrets drinking alcohol simply because he is suffering the consequences of driving while intoxicated.
Second scenario. A person gets drunk at a social gathering, misbehaves in front of everyone, and embarrasses his wife and children. Once sober, his wife reproaches him for his behavior and explains the damage and pain he caused his loved ones. After this warning, this man will surely regret drinking.
Third scenario. A guy gets drunk in public but luckily his drunkenness went unnoticed, and he didn’t embarrass anyone. He drove his car, but nothing happened to him or to others. In short: he did not suffer any serious consequences from his drunkenness. It is quite possible that in this scenario, ironically, this man would NOT regret getting drunk. Why? Because he was lucky enough not to suffer any negative consequences from his terrible mistake. And because of these positive circumstances, ironically, this individual is likely to continue to drink heavily and get drunk again. From this point of view, it was not so good for him to have been spared the consequences of his drunkenness.
Let us see now a fourth possibility. This individual drinks excessively and gets drunk, and fortunately, nothing negative happens to him. But still, when he recovers from his intoxication, he regrets his actions and repents “even though nothing serious happened to him.” This is the repentance that is considered by Rabbi Abohab to be of the highest moral level. Why? Because the remorse comes directly from the conscience, and not from an external factor that opened his eyes: an accident, a bad moment, or the intervention of a third party.
This type of “direct” repentance reflects that this individual has an inner voice, an active conscience (neshama) that nurtures the extraordinary ability to recognize our mistakes on our own and help us to correct our bad behavior without another factor or person having to open our eyes.
IMMEDIATE REGRET
Let’s imagine that I offended another person by saying to him an inappropriate word. If I would apologize immediately and say, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that”; “I didn’t mean to offend you”; “I was wrong”, “I used the wrong words, etc.” In most cases, my apologies will be accepted much more easily than when I apologize after a while, when I see this person the next time.
Rabbi Abohab explains that when one commits a transgression towards God or others and repents immediately and by his own moral compass, that “transgression” is considered a mistake, a temporary slip, an impulsive act, more than an offensive deliberate act.
And he concludes the exposition of this first level of TESHUBA by quoting a text from the Gemara in Berachot (10a) that says: “If you saw a Torah scholar committing a transgression during the night, in the morning, you must assume that he has already done Teshuba”. Why do we give this person the benefit of the doubt? First, we can see that a person who studies Tora, like any other human being, is not immune to making mistakes. But the study of the Divine commandments helps a person to develop an internal ethical referent, an active mental mechanism that keeps our conscience awake, and in these circumstances the moral alarm goes off as soon as we do something wrong, pushing us to repent, and preventing us from repeating the same mistake before it becomes a bad habit.
Rabbi Yosef Bitton
What is a Perozbul, and why you should sign one?
Breaking Bad Habits
The highest level of Teshuba (repentance) is when one regrets the mistake he or she made, immediately, before repeating it. In this way, a person will be preventing that incorrect behavior from becoming a habit. When someone does not repent of his mistake immediately and repeats his wrong behavior, he faces a different and perhaps greater challenge, which Rabbi Abohab calls: the second level of Teshuba: changing bad habits. How are habits formed? When someone persists in a certain behavior, this attitude is normalized –however wrong it may be– and the habit is formed. Once installed in the brain, habits are difficult to change. We get used to doing something wrong to the point that we no longer evaluate it. And when a behavior becomes a habit and we want to change it, it is no longer about changing what we do, but about changing what we are.
The first time I say a bad word or a vulgarity, I would notice it, realize my mistake immediately, repent (apologize if I use this language towards another person), and make the decision not to make the same mistake again. But when this process does not happen, when I ignore the first warning of my moral conscience (which is the most important one!) and I repeat the same bad words over and over again, I get used to my new vocabulary, and little by little I tolerate it more and more, to the point that I no longer realize that it is wrong. And at some point, this fatal transformation happens: the bad words become part of me. And from being “a decent person who uses bad words”, I become a “unpolite individual”
Psychologists explain that habits, both good and bad, are formed when our brain learns something new and, through repetition, the brain becomes “comfortable” with it and stops evaluating or judging the new behavior. This happens to us in many areas of our daily lives: eating or drinking excessively, smoking, etc. and also in more subliminal areas that affect our spirituality and morality. “Man is an animal of habit,” said the famous English writer Charles Dickens. When an immoral value becomes routine, the conscience no longer awakens by itself. It falls asleep and requires an external stimulus to wake up.
In the Hebrew calendar, the month of Elul is precisely when we dedicate ourselves to this type of deep repentance, that is, to evaluate not only our wrong actions but also our bad habits, which have been “normalized” because we did not do Teshuba on time, that is, when we were wrong the first time. Identifying my own bad habits is not an easy task. Because it’s not enough to look in the mirror. I have to be able to see myself as others see me, from the outside, “from the balcony”, in order to identify the bad habits that are already part of my personality and put all my effort into changing them.
KI TETSE: Walking, with your eyes wide open
By Rabbanit Coty Bittón
A couple of days later my husband came home and told my son that they were going for a short trip to town. Although I did not like the idea since our child was already in his pajamas and ready to sleep, I trusted my husband; he told me they would be back soon. Indeed, half an hour later the “three of them were back home: my husband, my son and his tricycle. There are no words to describe my son’s happy face!
It happened to be that on his way home my husband read on one of the neighborhood’s boards (luach modaot) a note saying that a tricycle was found and that whoever lost it could recover it, by giving a matching description. We took the opportunity to explain to our children about the Mitzva that appears on this week’s Perasha, Ki Tetse. It is called “hashabat abeda” , returning a lost object. We all appreciated how wonderful it is when you belong to a society where you know that everybody cares about everybody else!
In any other culture or civilization, you transgress the law when you steal or damage your fellow’s property. And, as long as you don’t cause any harm, you are a model citizen. Our Tora demands much more from us. It is not enough to abstain from damaging others. I have to CARE about someone else’s property as if it were my own.
If for example, I find a lost object I must take care of it and “find” the owner. In a Jewish society when you find something lost that can be identified (a 10 dollars bill, for example, cannot be “identified”; but a wallet, can), you can not keep it. You have to bother and pick it up, take it home, write the note, post it on the neighborhood’s board and be willing to welcome all those who would come and claim for their lost object until someone can identify it (simanim) beyond a reasonable doubt.
In Moreh Nevukhim, Maimonides explains that the primary purpose of this Mitzva is to positively affect the character of the individuals of the Jewish people. The Tora trains us and helps us to develop a degree of sensitivity towards others, which will make us walk with our eyes open to detect the needs of others. Is there anyone here who needs my help? We respect the privacy of others, but we must be careful that this does not lead us to a level of indifference. “It’s not my business” should be applied to many privacy issues in the lives of my friends and acquaintances, but not in situations where my assistance is needed. As in the case of hashabat abeda, I have to be willing to offer help, even when it has not been requested.
When we teach our children about this Mitzvah, we train them to be sensitive. “Is your friend sad? Is he going through a difficult time? Ask if you can help.” “A new student came to school. Open your eyes, ‘see’ her. She might be scared or embarrassed. She does not know the teachers or other students. Try to approach her and be her friend.”
SHABBAT SHALOM
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Israel’s Housing Market and The Mashiach (Part 4)
I received many questions from Halakha of the Day readers on the subject of Mashiach. Today I am going to address two of these questions, and in a future article on this topic B”H we will address the others.
1. Are we close to the times of the Mashiach?
INTRODUCTION
I confess that until I read Maimonides many years ago, I had many doubts and was very confused about the Mashiach and the messianic times. I think I also got a somewhat magical or childish vision on the subject. It was thanks to Maimonides and his intelligent Judaism that I was able to clarify many of those doubts. I also realized that I was suffering from a psychological problem that may be affecting other jews as well: The description of the messianic times, according to Maimonides, is so close to our own reality that it is challenging for us to appreciate it. It seems to be an inexplicable resistance to acknowledging that we are living in privileged times. This is a mental phenomenon that was already identified by our Sages: “An individual who experiences a miracle does not perceive it” אין בעל הנס מכיר בנסו.
Maimonides’ Mashiach is based on two very important characters in Jewish history: King David and Shimon Bar Kokhba. King David represents the ideal model of a Jewish ruler, whose mission is that we Jews follow the Divine Law. 1200 years later, a descendant of King David, Bar Kokhba, wanted to restore” Jewish sovereignty in the land of Israel, so that the Tora would once again become the Law of the Jewish people, but he failed. The most characteristic thing about the Mashiach, which Maimonides suggests when mentioning these two historical figures, –and the point that the average Jew ignores the most– is the «historical» and «national» and not mythological character of the Jewish Messiah, who is completely different from the Messiah represented by non-Jews. We must overcome the psychological barrier to hope for an “imaginary magical future” and be able to be infinitely grateful to Bore Olam “shehecheyanu, vekiyemanu vehigiaynu lazeman haze” for the opportunity to live in this present time, that is so close to messianic times, as we will explain below.
Let’s see what we have accomplished and what we lack, regarding the Mashiach
SHIABUD MALKHUIYOT
We already have a sovereign Jewish State: Medinat Israel. Let us not forget that according to Maimonides, the great difference between the messianic days and our days is that we Jews are not going to be under the yoke of the Goyim, as was the case, for example, in the Bar Kokhba times and in during the following 1800 years.
SHALOM
After 75 years of wars against our enemies, thanks to the recent “Abraham accords”, almost miraculously, we have peace treaties with countries that were our fiercest enemies. And it seems that there are going to be other peace agreements soon (Qatar? Saudi Arabia?). In the times of the Mashiach we would reach peace even with countries like Iran and other nations that today hate Israel. How will this happen? According to the Sages (see text below), in the days of Mashiach the nations will recognize and serve HaShem, and will see Israel as the people of God. This will bring about an era of peace and freedom, with no corruption. We are not there yet, but it would seem that we are closer than five years ago.
TORA AND OR LAGOYIM
At the present time, the State of Israel does not have a written constitution. And part of our messianic aspirations is that the Jewish State will embrace once again the Tora as its Constitution. We are not that far away from that point! In modern Israel there are legal areas, such as marriages and divorces, that are already governed by Tora Law. And in many areas of civil law, one may opt for a legal process carried by a rabbinical court or Bet Din. In addition, the demographics of the Jewish state are changing, and I think that there are more and more observant people. With the help of HaShem the Tora will become slowly as the only Law of Israel. Once this happens, the Jewish people will be OR LAGOYIM, the light of the peoples, the model of observance of God’s will to be followed by the other nations of the world, who will recognize the God of Israel and serve him.
BET HAMIQDASH
In 1967, at the end of the Six Day War, we had the opportunity to recover the Temple, and we missed ti…. This, in my opinion, was one of the worst national sins and mishaps we witnessed in our long history. When the Imams of the Waqf handed us the keys to Har HaBayit and unbelievably, a well-known Israeli general returned them to the Waqf! See here https://jcpa.org/al-aksa-is-in-danger-libel/al-aksa-is-in-danger-libel-temple-mount/ I believe that since the time of Jerobam ben Nebat we have never made such a tragic and tremendously consequential historical mistake. May God forgive us! In any case, we are still close to the possibility of rebuilding the Temple. Why? Because we already have Yerushalayim; it is our beloved and beautiful capital, and in theory, we have sovereignty over the Har HaBayit, the Temple Mount, which is where B”H we should build the Bet HaMiqdash.
In sum, and focusing on the first question, the ground is more ready than ever for the arrival of the Mashiach. But to appreciate this, it is necessary to first know what to expect from messianic times. And furthermore, and this is really important, we should understand that for Maimonides the messianic events will unfold naturally and gradually, as we say in the Berakha in which we pray every day for the Mashiach: מצמיח קרן ישועה, the redemption of the Jewish people “will sprout and flourish”, that is to say, it will happen thru a development of historical events, part of which we are B”H already witnessing with our own eyes.
2. What differences will there be between our times and the days of Mashiach?
I left for the end this important event that should happen in messianic times: KIBUTS GALUYIOT, that is, the return of the Jews to the land of Israel. But how will this return to Israel be implemented? Sometimes I ask myself if the Mashiach is going to take us to Israel “by force” or we will leave to Israel by choice. Why do I say this? Because I think (but I could be wrong) that the process of our future redemption, GEULA, might be similar to Yetsiat Mitsrayim: the redemption from Egypt. We Jews had the opportunity to leave Egypt, but HaShem, or Moshe, did not “force us” to leave. In fact, one of our Sages said something that sounds shameful for the Jewish people: that 80% of the Jews chose to stay back in Egypt! This makes me think that perhaps also at the time of Mashiach some Jews will voluntarily miss the opportunity to return to Israel….
Following Maimonides’ opinion as seriously as possible, I believe that one of the greatest differences between our days and the days of Mashiach is going to be noticed in housing prices. While in all the cities of the world where Jews live, properties prices will fall precipitously, in Israel, housing — that is already very expensive— will go up at least 5, 10 times more! I always say, a little jokingly, a little seriously, that if a Jew proclaims right and left that he or she believes the Mashiach is coming NOW, he should put his money where his words are, and invest everything he has in buying a property in Israel! And if he doesn’t, he shouldn’t be taken too seriously when he talks about it .
Be a true believer: invest in Israel today. 🙂
MAIMONIDES
Mishne Tora Hilkhot MT Melakhim, chapter 12
א אל יעלה על הלב שבימות המשיח, ייבטל דבר ממנהגו של עולם, או יהיה שם חידוש במעשה בראשית; אלא עולם כמנהגו הולך. וזה שנאמר בישעיה וגר זאב עם כבש, ונמר עם גדי ירבץ, משל וחידה. עניין הדבר—שיהיו ישראל יושבין לבטח עם רשעי העולם, המשולים בזאב ונמר: שנאמר זאב ערבות ישודדם—נמר שוקד על עריהם ויחזרו כולם לדת האמת, ולא יגזולו ולא ישחיתו, אלא יאכלו דבר המותר בנחת כישראל, שנאמר ואריה כבקר יאכל תבן אמרו חכמים, אין בין העולם הזה לימות המשיח, אלא שיעבוד מלכייות בלבד.
Let it not occur to one to think that in the days of the Messiah something will change in the physical and natural laws established since the time of Creation: in reality, the world will follow its natural order. And what is said in Isaiah “And the wolf will dwell with the lamb, and the tiger will lie down by the goat” (Isaiah 11:6), [which apparently suggests that carnivorous animals will become herbivorous and stop chasing their prey] is a parable and a metaphor. And what it means is that Israel [the lamb that the predators wish to devour] will live in peace with the nations of the world, which [because of their permanent aggression and threats towards Israel] were compared to wolves and tigers [regarding the lamb: Israel]…. all nations will return to the true religion, and there will be no robbery or corruption…
…. The sages said, that there will be no difference between this world and the days of the Messiah, except the yoke of the nations [the oppression of Israel; that in messianic times it will end].
The Afterlife
לע”נ הרב אליהו דב בן גיטל
