SELIHOT and the secret of the 13 attributes

The core of the Selihot prayer we recite before and during Yom Kippur is the Biblical text ‘Amonay, Amonay, E-l Rahum veHanun….”. These words are known as the 13 attributes of God’s compassion.
Maimonides explains that by attributes, we should not understand that these are qualities of HaShem, i.e., what God “IS” (which is beyond our comprehension), but rather, how HaShem operates in this world as it appears to us.
These words were invoked by Moshe Rabbenu at a very delicate time: when the people of Israel built and worshiped the golden calf and HaShem wanted to destroy Israel. Moshe pleaded to HaShem to forgive ‘am Israel, and as we know, He did.
Rabbi Yochanan explained that God Almighty showed Moshe Rabbenu that by invoking these 13 principles, the transgressors would be forgiven.
The 13 principles say the following:
HASHEM – God, behaving with compassion. As opposed to Eloqim, which alludes to God, acting with strict justice.
HASHEM – (we will explain below this repetition of God’s name)
E-L – mighty in compassion to give all creatures according to their need;
RAHUM – merciful, that humankind may not be distressed;
VEHANUN – and gracious if humankind is already in distress;
EREKH APAIM – slow to anger;
VERAB HESED – and generous in kindness;
VE-EMET- and truth;
NOTSER HESED LAALAFIM – keeping His kindness for thousand generations;
NOSE AVON – forgiving iniquity;
VAFESHA– and transgression;
VAHATAA – and sin;
VENAQE – and pardoning.
Rabbi Eliyahu da Vidas (1518-1592) writes in his book Reshit Hokhma (שער הענוה פרק א) that the expression of the Talmud “by invoking these 13 attributes, the transgressors will be forgiven” should not be understood as by reciting these 13 attributes but “by performing these 13 attributes”. This means that when we emulate these attributes of God with our peers, we will be forgiven by God.
A few illustrations:
HASHEM, HASHEM: The repetition of the name of God demands an explanation. Our rabbis taught that from this repetition, we learn a wonderful lesson about God’s complete forgiveness. When we truly repent for our transgressions, God will forgive us completely and will never remind us again of that sin. The repetition of God’s names teaches us thus that He will behave with us after we repent exactly as He behaved with us before we sinned. There is no grudge or resentment but total and complete forgiveness. Thus, if we want to be forgiven by God, we need to act toward others as we want God to act toward us. Namely, when we forgive others, we should delete and erase all bad feelings toward the person who offended us, and we should act toward him or her as we did before the offense.
EREKH APAYIM (Patient) HaShem waits patiently for us to repent. Instead of punishing us immediately for our sins, God gives us time to repent and avoid punishment. So too, if someone wrongs us, we should give that person time to repent and make amends.
VEEMET (Truth). He keeps His promises of good even if we do not deserve that good anymore. If we promise to do a good thing for another person, we should keep our word even if that person no longer deserves it.
NOTSER HESED LAALAFIM (Keeps His Kindness for thousand generations) If we owe a debt of gratitude to someone, we should continue to express that gratitude to that person’s descendants.
When we recite these attributes, we should learn from them, not just how HaShem behaves with us, but also how HaShem expects us to behave with others.


FAST OF GEDALIA: Why Do We Fast Today?

Today September 28th, 2022, 3 of Tishri 5783, is Tsom Gedalia, a fast day instituted to remember the murder of Gedalia Ben Achiqam, the governor of Israel during the days of Nebuchadnezzar, king of Babylon.
DESTRUCTION OF THE FIRST TEMPLE
When Nebuchadnezzar destroyed the Temple of Jerusalem (586 before the common era), he killed a large part of the population of Judea (Yehuda). He also took tens of thousands of Jews to Babylon. Many other Jews escaped to neighboring nations like Amon and Moab, (Jordan, today). Once Jerusalem was destroyed, the independent Jewish state ceased to exist. And Nebuchadnezzar declared Yehuda a province of the Babylonian Empire. The Babylonians allowed a few of the defeated Jewish population, the poorest peasants, to remain in Israel to work the land in order to avoid desertification.
GEDALIA BEN AHIQAM
To govern these few remaining Jews, Nebuchadnezzar appointed Gedalia ben Ahiqam, a Jewish nobleman who lived in Babylon, as governor of Judea. It was an unexpected positive gesture from Nebuchadnezzar. A miracle that a Jew, and not a gentile, was appointed to take care of Judea. Gedalia belonged to the Shafan family, noble Jews who settled in Babylon in the exile of Yekhonia (597 BCE) and had gained the emperor’s trust. Gedalia promised loyalty to the king of Babel. The prophet Yirmiyahu (Jeremias) who had chosen to remain in Israel with the survivors, joined Gedalia in Mitspa and together they hoped that soon the Babylonian emperor would allow the Jews to return to Judea and perhaps allow them to rebuild the Temple. Optimism was in the air….
RETURNING TO ISRAEL
When the Jewish refugees who had escaped to Ammon, Moab to avoid death heard that Gedalia was assigned governor, they returned jubilantly to Israel. They resettled in the land, worked it, and reaped its fruits with great success. With Gedalia in charge, the hope of returning to normal life and rebuilding the Bet haMiqdash was now more real than ever.
THE MAGNICIDE
But then, the unimaginable happened. The kingdoms of Ammon and Egypt were allies, and they were enemies of Babylon. They knew that with Gedalia as governor of Judea, it would be easier for Babylon to eventually conquer Ammon. Ba’alis, the king of Ammon, designed a plan to get rid of Gedalia without being directly involved, avoiding in that way any retaliation by the Babylonians. A Jewish refugee descendant of King David, Yishma’el Ben Netania, voiced his opposition to Gedalia, claiming that the latter did not belong to the Davidic dynasty and therefore could not hold the position of governor of the Jews. This claim was obviously absurd, out of place and completely ridiculous.
WHEN THE ENEMY OF YOUR ENEMY IS NOT YOUR FRIEND
But knowing Yishma’el’s personal ambitions, Ba’alis convinced him that he should kill Gedalia, and offered his help in carrying out the murder, and his political support to proclaim him as the new King of Judea. On the third day of the seventh Hebrew month (Tishri), Yishma’el and a group of armed men arrived in the city of Mitspa. Gedalia cordially received Yishmael with honors due to a descendant of the Davidic dynasty. Gedalia had been warned of Yishma’el’s intention to kill him, but he refused to give credit to that information, convinced that a Jew would never kill another Jew. And besides, why would someone with a minimum of common sense, jeopardize the renewed hopes of Israel’s redemption when those were crystallizing? … But the inexplicable happened. Yishma’el and his men murdered Gedalia and the Babylonian officers that were with him. This murder committed by a Jew was considered an act of insubordination against Nebuchadnezzar, a Jewish coup d’etat against Babylon …
THE SECOND EXILE
When hearing the news of this terrible crime, the Jews who had settled in Israel panicked and thought their best option was to flee to Egypt for fear of reprisals from Nebuchadnezzar. In Egypt, unfortunately, they only found more calamities, hunger, persecution, and death. And so, the land of Israel remained virtually without a Jewish population, and the hopes of returning to Yerushalayim and rebuilding the Bet haMiqdash vanished. It was as if we lost our land for a second time … or worse, because this time, the exile was caused by ourselves …
To remember this horrific tragedy, our Prophets instituted the Fast of Gedalia on the Third day of the Hebrew month of Tishri, the day after Rosh HaShana.
Rabbi Yosef Bitton
Who is exempted from fasting today?
Minors: boys under 13 and girls under 12 years old are exempt from fasting.
Nursing women: According to the Sephardic Minhag, after giving birth women are exempted from fasting for 24 months, even if they are not actually nursing their baby. In some Sephardic communities and in Ashkenazi communities, nursing mothers are only exempt while they are actually nursing their babies. Pregnant women are exempt from fasting.
A person who feels ill or who experiences symptoms of flu or fever, or a person with a chronic disease, such as diabetes, should not fast today.
Elders should consult with their physicians if the fast will affect their health. If it will, they are exempted (or prohibited) from fasting.
The fast is observed from daybreak till nightfall.
UMJCA : From 5:35 AM to 7:12 PM. Other communities see here


MY BOOKS

UPCOMING BOOK

His next book is about Genesis Chapter 1, verses 26-28, on the creation of man and woman. Creation is a progressive process: from atoms to life, from life to intelligence, and from intelligence to empathy. Man was created on the Sixth Day, the same as other mammals. But unlike animals, mas was granted a Nefesh Chaya (ruach memalela) that is: verbal intelligence. Unlike animals that perceive reality through sight, smell and sharing, humans think with words, that is: we grasp reality linguistically. And among other things thought makes room for many possible responses to any given impulse. Humans possess freedom of choice or the ability to respond (response-ability) and say yes or no to our urges. Language also allows man to classify reality: he names the animals and the surrounding elements, creating systems that connect words to things.    Unlike all other animals, in the beginning, a man was created alone. And in a different act of creation, both in terms of timing and the source of this creation, God fashioned woman: as a special companion opposite to man. Designed with a unique type of non-verbal intelligence, that modern scientist Simon Baron-Cohen, author of the book “The essential difference” defines as“empathy”.   Both men and women are to act and work together, using their different uniqueness to complement and supplement each other in synergy and harmony.

IF YOU LOVE ME, READ MY MIND

IF YOU LOVE ME, READ MY MIND
a Shalom Bayit Workshop, by Rabbi Yosef Bitton.

One of the biggest challenges we face is the rise of divorce rates, the growth in the number of men and women who chose to remain single, and the difficulties with Shalom Bayit for the couples that stay in their marriage. To address these very real crises, we must first understand the causes. This workshop addresses one of the main reasons for the lack of happiness and fulfillment in marriage: men and women were created differently by design. Their nature, needs, thought processes, and communication methods are different. Men and women differ in the way they experience and convey emotions; in the way they deal with tensions and challenges; in the way that they solve problems, and in the way that they communicate feelings and love. These differences, when unknown and unacknowledged, cause a lot of unnecessary stress and friction and often damage the relationship between husband and wife. Learning about these differences is essential for achieving a level of understanding and acceptance which will strengthen the married couple for years to come.

THE WORKSHOP
The workshop I’m presenting consists of three units, each focusing on both theory and practical application regarding the innate differences between male and female brains.

The first class is for the couple; we explore the biblical story of Creation and what we learn from the fact that men and women were created in two different acts, from two different sources, and with two different types of intelligence. We explore the ways men and women communicate with each other and the tools we need to learn to reach a better and more healthy relationship.

The second class, just for women, focuses on what men need: physically and psychologically. The challenges of direct or indirect communication and how learning the language of “trade” can improve men’s response. We also refer to the eighth week and the beginning of the male brain and the dynamics between love and intimacy in a man’s world.

The third class is addressed just to men. Women yearn for love and companionship and yet, they would hardly express these needs explicitly. The female brain expects her love circle to understand each other without the mediation of words, almost telepathically. Husbands need to learn how to listen to their wives and almost how to read their feelings. Mastering the 5 love languages

THE SOURCES
(1) This workshop is based on Tora and Jewish values. Is presented around biblical verses and examples. And yet it is designed for modern couples, and it is suitable for all levels of religious observance.
(2) All the information brought in the workshop about the brain and the innate differences between the genders is based on peer-reviewed scientific findings. Mostly on the research of Dr. Simon Baron Cohen, a neuroscientist from Cambridge University, and Dr. Louann Brizendine, an American neuropsychiatrist.



Good News: Your dad is the Judge!

This Shabbat is unique since it is at the center of “The Ten Days of Teshuba”, the days between Rosh haShana and Yom Kippur. During these ten days, we ask God repeatedly to inscribe us in the book of life.
And we also make a meaningful change in the text of the Amida, the central prayer: instead of saying HaE-l haQadosh, “Holy God” we say HaMelech haQadosh, “Holy King”.

These additions and changes help us get into the right mind for Yom Kippur.

What does HaMelekh Qadosh mean?

MELEKH: When we say “Melekh” we should not be thinking of a king from a fairy tale. We have to think instead of “Judge”. Why? In a monarchical state, the king acts as the Supreme Judge, the highest authority. The king also issues the final verdict in terms of the life and death of his subjects. He can sentence someone to die, and he can also spare the life of an individual sentenced to death. These days we think of HaShem as the Supreme Judge, knowing that it is in His hands whether or not we deserve the opportunity to live another year. On Rosh haShanah, the Heavenly Court inscribes human beings in one of two books: the book of life or the other book. But the final verdict is not sealed until the end of Yom Kippur, when the Judge signs the final sentence. During this time — after the ruling has been issued but before it’s signed — I have to appeal a possible “guilty” verdict. My mission is to convince the Judge that if He didn’t inscribe me yet in the Book of Life, He should reconsider. I have a few more days to prove that I sincerely regret what I did wrong. During these days, including this Shabbat, I have to prove to the Supreme Judge that I can be better. On Yom Kippur, I will stand before the Supreme Judge, acting as my advocate and pleading for my life.

QADOSH: “Qadosh”, is usually translated as “holy”. But in the context of this expression, HaMelech haQadosh means “unique”, “different”. In other words, we are saying that HaShem is a very different judge from the other judges. First, God is an invisible judge, whom we do not see, but who sees us, knows us, and knows our secrets and private lives, which no human judge can know. HaShem is “unique” and “different” because he is a Judge whom we cannot deceive with appearances or flattery… He is “unique” because nothing escapes His knowledge. Unlike a human judge, HaShem knows my thoughts, intentions, and potential.

ABINU: But if He knows everything, how will my repentance affect His final judgment and His verdict? HaShem as Judge is “unique” because He is my Creator as well, that is, my Father. And I know what to be a parent means. When one of my children makes a mistake, I want to make sure that they recognize that they have made a mistake and learned a valuable lesson from their bad experience. And once I see that my child has learned his lesson, why would I want to punish him? Suppose my child comes to me spontaneously, admits his mistake honestly, and shows me that he will take the necessary steps to not make the same mistake in the future. In that case, I will hug him, encourage him, and show him that I trust him and am happy that he has finally learned his lesson. Similarly, when we approach HaShem on Yom Kippur and admit and confess our mistakes and transgressions, showing Him that we have learned our lesson, He will surely forgive us and suspend any potential negative sentence. Because apart from being our “Judge”, God is our Father: we are the Judge’s children!

This tremendously important concept is mentioned in the beautiful prayer we say every day now until Yom Kippur, including this coming Shabbat: ABINU MALKENU, declaring and reminding ourselves that apart from being our Judge, God is also our Father.



How to miss the greatest opportunity of the year?

Yom Kippur is the most important day of the Jewish year. The day we confess our mistakes and misdeeds to God, resolving to improve our actions during the following year. Hoping that HaShem will accept our apologies, inscribe us and seal us in the book of life. Now, as important as Yom Kippur is, if we fail to do our homework previous to Yom Kippur, the most important day of the year might become the most significant wasted opportunity of the year.
 
BEFORE Yom Kippur begins, we must ask forgiveness from those whom we might have offended or caused any damage, emotional or material. During Yom Kippur, the transgressions between us and God (Shabbat, Kashrut, Tefilin, etc.) are effectively forgiven by confessing them and resolving to improve. But God does not forgive us for those offenses made toward another human being: bullying, cheating, lying, stealing, embarrassing, talking badly about someone (leshon hara’), etc. All these transgressions are NOT forgiven on Yom Kippur unless we first approach those we hurt and ask for their forgiveness.
 
If we are serious about this, we should sit with ourselves for a few minutes with pen, paper, and a humble heart. We should review in our memories the times we might have caused pain and damage to other people: friends, colleagues or family members, parents, spouse, etc.
 
Then, we should think about what would be the most effective way of appeasing each particular individual. By phone or in person? By a long email or by a text? Should we describe in detail what we have done wrong, or should we ask for forgiveness in a more general way? Since every person is different and every case is unique, there is not one formula to appease every individual. We must use our common sense and find a way for our apology to be sincere, credible, and effective.
 
Asking for forgiveness is probably one of the most challenging tasks we might need to do. Because we need to admit and say: “I WAS WRONG”. It takes a lot of humility and emotional strength to face the victim. I think it helps if one considers the humiliation as part of the Kappara (atonement) within the Teshuba process.
 
A second list we should write ASAP is a list of our debts, like money we owe in our business or to providers, to friends or family members, unpaid community donations, Tzedaqa that we promised to give, etc. We should prioritize those debts that have expired or are about to expire. This is the right time to do it—today or (literally) during the next couple of days.
 


We the sheep

זוכרנו לחיים מלך חפץ בחיים
Rosh haShana, the Jewish New Year,  is the day of judgment. On that day God examines our actions and decides what we deserve for this coming year, based on what we have done this past year.
There is a very beautiful metaphor that our rabbis mentioned in the Mishna to illustrate this profound idea. In Rosh haShana כל באי עולם עוברין לפניו כבני מרום “All human beings walk before the Almighty as sheep [in front of the shepherd] “
Once a year the shepherd gathers all his animals in a barn to carefully examine each of them. An expert shepherd needs just a few seconds to “judge” each animal. First, he takes a look at the animal and then examines with his hand the quality of the animal’s wool and the body of the sheep. After this short inspection, the shepherd takes his brush and marks each sheep with a different color.    If the wool of the sheep is of good quality, the shepherd will mark the back of the sheep with, say, a yellow color. This means that this animal will be sent to shearing. A sheep that is healthy and strong will be marked with blue paint, which means that this sheep will be destined for reproduction. Now, if the wool is not of good quality and the sheep is not in a good condition for reproduction, the shepherd will mark the sheep with a red color, which indicates that this sheep will be slaughtered and used for food.  In those few seconds, the shepherd determines the destiny of each animal for the next cycle.
Our rabbis used this beautiful illustration to explain how we humans are judged by HaShem, our Shepherd, on Rosh HaShana. The Almighty looks carefully at each one of us. HaShem observes what we have done and have not done during the previous year. He sees if we have grown, learned, and improved, or if we have wasted our time… Then, He determines our destiny, marking us for success, for good health, and for life or Has veShalom for nothing of that….
Two very important observations.
1. How do we know what color the mark that we carry on our backs after Rosh haShana is? The sheep walk around the barn without knowing what color the mark on their back is. Similarly,  we human beings can not know for sure what color is stamped on our backs… We might think that we have done many good things during the past year, but we can not be sure that what we have done is enough in the eyes of HaShem. Perhaps, knowing my full potential, God expected much more from me. Therefore, since we cannot be sure of the color we have been marked, we ALL ASSUME (perhaps as a strategy) that we carry a red mark.
2. What now? Our advantage over the sheep is that, unlike the sheep, our destiny is still in a pending status, because the final verdict remains open until Yom Kippur! Thus, for the following week, we Jews pray to God, literallym for our lives. We repent, we cry, we admit our faults, we beg for forgiveness and we try to “convince the Shepherd” with credible arguments and actions, that, although during the past year we might have not done great, next year we will. On Yom Kippur, we devote the whole day exclusively to this matter: appealing the possible capital sentence pending on our backs! We resolve to improve and ultimately we appeal to HaShem’s compassion to grant us “hayim”, “life”, a new opportunity to show Him that we are worthy of our existence. The magic of Teshuba, the process of repentance, is that HaShem gives us the opportunity to appeal His own verdict.


ROSH HASHANA: We and the Judge

ה ‘מֶלֶךְ יושֵׁב עַל כִּסֵּא דִין
Rosh haShana is the beginning of the new Jewish year. We will be celebrating the beginning of the year 5783 this coming Sunday night, September 25th at night. Starting a new year is, of course, a reason for celebration, optimism, and happiness. But for the Jewish people, a new year is mainly a very serious event. To the point that the Sages spoke more, much more, about the serious aspects of Rosh haShana than the celebratory aspects of the New Year. The rabbis of the Mishna explained that Rosh haShana is nothing less than the day of judgment (יום הדין). What judgment? The most meaningful one. Judging and evaluating what I’m doing with my life.
And guess who is judging you?
God. And yourself. Or better said: I judge myself in the presence of God.
The trial begins in the morning.  When we enter the synagogue on Monday, September 26th, that is, 1 of Tishri, we should visualize that we are entering a courtroom. Our first and most important challenge is to find the Judge. He is there, but cannot be “seen” in a normal way. To see the Judge, to feel His presence, we use the help of our prayers. When correctly understood, the prayers should open our eyes and help us identify God as the King. Why King? Because in the Hebrew mind one of the main roles of the Kings of Israel was to judge his subjects (think, for example, of King Solomon’s judgment). The King was the Highest, and final, Judicial instance.  Therefore during Rosh haShana –and until the end of Yom Kippur– we repeatedly refer to God in our prayers using a keyword: “MELEKH”, which in Hebrew means “King” (or MALKENU, our King) but in the context of Rosh haShana should be understood as “Judge”.
The most special event of Rosh haShana, is also aimed at identifying the Judge and making us feel that we are standing in front of Him. I am referring to the blowing of the Shofar, the ram’s horn.  In ancient Israel, the Shofar was blown when a new King was crowned. In the same way, when hearing the Shofar on Rosh Hashana we “crown” God, meaning we accept Him as our King and we acknowledge that he is judging us.  If we do not take this profound existential idea lightly, when listening to the Shofar we might feel overwhelmed, paralyzed, and shocked, realizing that the Supreme Judge is examining us, and knowing that He knows us better than we know ourselves.  We might or crying out of fear, awe, or shame.   If this happens, if we tremble inside when hearing the Shofar, it means that the Shofar is working properly and that we are reacting correctly to its sound.
While the Shofar is blown we do not have to admit any guilt, we don’t need to confess or repent, or even ask for His forgiveness (and needless to say, when hearing the Shofar we should not be “asking” HaShem for things!). We are permanently asking God to listen and fulfill all our needs.   Except when we listen to the Shofar. The Shofar is a Divine wake-up call. This is the only time that HaShem is calling us, summoning us. When we hear the Shofar, we should feel that the Judge is presiding over the celestial Court that is judging me.


Admitting that we don’t know…

Today is the 8th day of Elul, 5770

Hakarat haChet, acknowledging our mistakes, is the first step of the process of Teshuba (repentance and change).

One of the reasons admitting our mistakes becomes so challenging is because we usually act as our own judges… and we don’t know any better!

Let me offer you a personal illustration:

English is my third language. My English grammar skills are not that strong. While writing I make many mistakes, but I’m not aware of most of them. Once I wrote “If you’re seating…” instead of “sitting”… Before I send the group email I always check the spelling. Nothing was wrong! I read it a second and a third time. Everything looked fine ‘to me’… The truth is that I had no chance to correct myself because I didn’t know the difference between writing ‘seating’ and ‘sitting’! My ignorance –voluntary ignorance to a certain extent- prevented any improvement in my actions!

So, what is the solution?

Improve your ‘knowledge’! Learning more English will help me to be more perceptive and will empower me to detect future mistakes.

The same is true with Judaism. I want to do Teshuba. I want to become a better Jew. Then, first: I’ve to learn more about Judaism. Otherwise, it’s a catch-22: I think I know, but  I don’t know any better, how am I supposed to improve myself?

Learning Tora is a prerequisite to detecting our flaws and improving ourselves.



Regret After Drinking: Four Scenarios

THE HIGHEST LEVEL OF TESHUBA

In his book Menorat haMaor, Rabbi Isaac Abohab, who lived in Spain during the 14th century, writes (p. 668-669) that there are seven levels of Teshuba or repentance. These levels are divided according to the timing and circumstances of the act of repentance. That is, when and why does repentance take place? The first level of Teshuba, which is also the highest and most effective, is when one regrets what he or she did wrong immediately, on his own initiative, without the intervention of third parties, and without being motivated by external factors. When this happens, says Rabbi Abohab, it is an indication that this individual’s conscience is awake and active.

DRINKING AND REGRETTING

We will try to understand a little better this profound idea.

Imagine a person who drinks too much alcohol and gets drunk.

In the first scenario, this individual drives his car, goes through a red light, is stopped by the police, is fined and his driver’s license is taken away. Under these circumstances, this individual surely regrets drinking alcohol simply because he is suffering the consequences of driving while intoxicated.

Second scenario. A person gets drunk at a social gathering, misbehaves in front of everyone, and embarrasses his wife and children. Once sober, his wife reproaches him for his behavior and explains the damage and pain he caused his loved ones. After this warning, this man will surely regret drinking.

Third scenario. A guy gets drunk in public but luckily his drunkenness went unnoticed, and he didn’t embarrass anyone. He drove his car, but nothing happened to him or to others. In short: he did not suffer any serious consequences from his drunkenness. It is quite possible that in this scenario, ironically, this man would NOT regret getting drunk. Why? Because he was lucky enough not to suffer any negative consequences from his terrible mistake. And because of these positive circumstances, ironically, this individual is likely to continue to drink heavily and get drunk again. From this point of view, it was not so good for him to have been spared the consequences of his drunkenness.

Let us see now a fourth possibility. This individual drinks excessively and gets drunk, and fortunately, nothing negative happens to him. But still, when he recovers from his intoxication, he regrets his actions and repents “even though nothing serious happened to him.” This is the repentance that is considered by Rabbi Abohab to be of the highest moral level. Why? Because the remorse comes directly from the conscience, and not from an external factor that opened his eyes: an accident, a bad moment, or the intervention of a third party.

This type of “direct” repentance reflects that this individual has an inner voice, an active conscience (neshama) that nurtures the extraordinary ability to recognize our mistakes on our own and help us to correct our bad behavior without another factor or person having to open our eyes.

IMMEDIATE REGRET

Let’s imagine that I offended another person by saying to him an inappropriate word. If I would apologize immediately and say, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that”; “I didn’t mean to offend you”; “I was wrong”, “I used the wrong words, etc.” In most cases, my apologies will be accepted much more easily than when I apologize after a while, when I see this person the next time.

Rabbi Abohab explains that when one commits a transgression towards God or others and repents immediately and by his own moral compass, that “transgression” is considered a mistake, a temporary slip, an impulsive act, more than an offensive deliberate act.

And he concludes the exposition of this first level of TESHUBA by quoting a text from the Gemara in Berachot (10a) that says: “If you saw a Torah scholar committing a transgression during the night, in the morning, you must assume that he has already done Teshuba”. Why do we give this person the benefit of the doubt? First, we can see that a person who studies Tora, like any other human being, is not immune to making mistakes. But the study of the Divine commandments helps a person to develop an internal ethical referent, an active mental mechanism that keeps our conscience awake, and in these circumstances the moral alarm goes off as soon as we do something wrong, pushing us to repent, and preventing us from repeating the same mistake before it becomes a bad habit.

Rabbi Yosef Bitton



What is a Perozbul, and why you should sign one?

This year that is coming to an end, 5782, has been a Shemita year.  In addition to the restrictions of working the land in Israel and transacting with produce from the land of Israel,  the Tora also prescribes that each Jew shall renounce his or her right to recover a debt from any other Jew.  This means that, as soon as Rosh HaShana commences next week, if I have lent money to another Jew, I now will have the obligation to never charge this person this money.  It is a beautiful precept and one that allowed Jews to start fresh.  It is a sort of biblical bankruptcy protection that allowed people to push the reset button at least once every seven years.
But, wait, so does this mean that cousin Jim will never need to pay back the $500 I lent him?
During the first century of the common era, before the Second Temple was destroyed, Hillel the Elder, the foremost sage of his generation and head of the Jewish Supreme Court at that time, realized that Jews were refraining from making any loans during the Shemita year.  After all, why lend money that becomes unrecoverable if not paid back before Rosh HaShana?  Actually, the Tora already foresaw this possibility, and warned us not to refrain from making loans during this year; but Hillel saw that people were still not lending.  Paradoxically, poor people were harmed by this precept because now there were no loans available.  Hillel came up with a legal device that permits lenders to recover on their loans even after the Rosh HaShana following Shemita.  The device is called “Perozbol,” (also “prozbol”, “prozbul”, or most people call it “pruzbul”) and we employ it to date.
In essence, the Biblical precept says that one needs to “let go” of the borrower (“Shamot Kol Ba’al Mashe Yado”) and refrain from demanding the repayment of the debt.  However, if a debt is recognized by a court (say, if the lender sued the borrower and the court agreed that the debt needs to be repaid), this “debt” is now in a way an obligation to the court, not to the lender.  It is a matter of justice more than personal debt.
Hillel’s device then is to declare before a Jewish court the debt in question so that it is recognized officially by a court even before it is due.  If Jim owes me $500, I should then – after the loan but before Rosh HaShana – write a document to a Jewish court declaring before them that this money is due and that the lender intends to recover it whenever.  This declaration is called Perozbol.  By doing this, the debt survives the Shemita, and the lender is not transgressing the precept; after all, the lender will not demand the repayment of the debt – the court will – and so there will be nothing to be “let go” (“Shamot”).
A few notes:
· The Shemita debt forgiveness applies to actual loans, but not to debts that are owed due to services received, goods purchased or legal damages owed
· The Perozbol device is only permissible while the laws of Shemita are rabbinical (these laws will regain their biblical status once the majority of Jews live in Israel); otherwise, loans really need to be forgiven
· The borrower needs to have some real estate; this is so that the debt may be assigned to a court (the court can only assume a debt that can be attached to a real estate lien)
· The court to whom one delivers the Perozbol should be a court with authority to make liens and to seize property
· It is proper and appropriate to repay one’s debts next year even if the lender did not do a Perozbol; in such case, the borrower should be clear that this is not a repayment but rather a gift
· It is also proper and appropriate to forgive one’s loans, especially if the borrower could use the relief of not having to repay what is owed
by Rabbi Jacob Bittón
PRINTABLE FORM
 
The form we present here requires the signature of two suitable witnesses, the lender should also do a qinyan (one form requires the ender to sign). The lender can keep the form with him. 
 
https://halachayomit.co.il/Pruzbul-English.pdf