by Daniel Kruger,  UNIVERSITY OF MICHIGAN

May 8, 2018

Social media platforms are using the same techniques as gambling firms to create psychological dependencies and ingrain their products in the lives of their users, experts warn.

These methods are so effective they can activate similar mechanisms as cocaine in the brain, create psychological cravings and even invoke “phantom calls and notifications” where users sense the buzz of a smartphone, even when it isn’t really there.

“Facebook, Twitter and other companies use methods similar to the gambling industry to keep users on their sites,” said Natasha Schüll, the author of Addiction by Design, which reported how slot machines and other systems are designed to lock users into a cycle of addiction. “In the online economy, revenue is a function of continuous consumer attention – which is measured in clicks and time spent.”

Whether it’s Snapchat streaks, Facebook photo-scrolling, or playing CandyCrush, Schüll explained, you get drawn into “ludic loops” or repeated cycles of uncertainty, anticipation and feedback — and the rewards are just enough to keep you going.

“If you disengage, you get peppered with little messages or bonus offers to get your attention and pull you back in,” said Schüll. “We have to start recognizing the costs of time spent on social media. It’s not just a game – it affects us financially, physically and emotionally.”

Recreating the slot machine The pull-to-refresh and infinite scrolling mechanism on our news feeds are unnervingly similar to a slot machine, said Tristan Harris, a former design ethicist for Google who has been described as the closest thing Silicon Valley has to a conscience.

“You pull a lever and immediately receive either an enticing reward (a match, a prize!) or nothing,” Harris wrote.

We cannot know when we will be rewarded, and more often than not we don’t find anything interesting or gratifying, much like gambling. But that’s precisely what keeps us coming back.

“The rewards are what psychologists refer to as variable reinforcement schedules and is the key to social media users repeatedly checking their screens,” said Dr Mark Griffiths, a professor of behavioural addiction and director of Nottingham Trent University’s International Gaming Research Unit.

“Social media sites are chock-a-block with unpredictable rewards. They are trying to grab users’ attentions … to make social media users create a routine and habitually check their screens.”

Like gambling, which physically alters the brain’s structure and makes people more susceptible to depression and anxiety, social media use has been linked to depression and its potential to have an adverse psychological impact on users cannot be overlooked or underestimated.

For instance, phone dependency, driven by high social-media usage, can lead us to think our phone is vibrating, or that we have received a message, even when we haven’t.

“Phantom calls and notifications are linked to our psychological craving for such signals,” said IHPI member Professor Daniel Kruger, an expert in human behavior, from the University of Michigan. “These social media messages can activate the same brain mechanisms as cocaine [does] and this is just one of the ways to identify those mechanisms because our minds are a physiological product of our brain.”

“There are whole departments trying to design their systems to be as addictive as possible. They want you to be permanently online and by bombarding you with messages and stimuli try to redirect your attention back to their app or webpage.”

ARTICLE

https://ihpi.umich.edu/news/social-media-copies-gambling-methods-create-psychological-cravings

THE SOCIAL DILEMMA , Netflix 2020 

Tristan Harris, former Google design ethicist and co-founder of the Center for Humane Technology, explains in the documentary that there are three main goals of tech companies:

1. The Engagement Goal: To increase usage and ensure users continue scrolling.
2. The Growth Goal: To ensure users are coming back and inviting friends, who in turn invite even more friends.
3. The Advertisement Goal: To make sure that while the above two goals are happening, the companies are also making as much money as possible from advertisements.

Harris summed this up with the warning: “If you’re not paying for the product, you are the product.”

THE FIRST ARMY OF ISRAEL

Our most precious possession is our children: we work for them, save money for them, and make every necessary effort to ensure that they lack nothing and have everything they need—and if possible, more. My question is: do we, as parents, consistently act with this goal in mind, or do we sometimes forget the importance of our children?

In the first parasha of this week, Mattot, the Torah tells us that the tribes of Reuben and Gad had a lot of livestock. Before entering the land of Israel, they asked Moshe to settle on the other side of the Jordan River in the territories of Sichon and Og, which were very fertile lands. Moshe initially refused. Why? Because the Jewish people had to face the powerful Canaanite nations militarily, and they needed a strong and solid army. These tribes constituted nearly 20% of the army, and their desertion would cause great frustration among the other tribes. Moshe asked them: “How can you settle in these lands and leave your brothers to fight without you?” Moshe demanded that they join the conquest war. The leaders of these tribes then told Moshe that they would not abandon the rest of the tribes: the plan was to settle their families in the new lands and quickly join the army of Israel, fight alongside their brothers, and then return to their families. These were the words they said to Moshe (beMidbar 32:16): “…in the lands of Og and Sichon ‘we will build pens for our livestock and cities for our children… we will leave our families there and immediately join the army.” Moshe accepted the proposal and responded affirmatively with these words (beMidbar 32:25): “All right, then, build the cities for your children and the pens for your animals, and join the army…”

MOSHE AND DR. FREUD

At this point, it is worth noting, with Freudian eyes, a small but very significant difference between what the leaders of these tribes said and what Moshe told them. The leaders of the tribes mentioned that they would build “pens to settle their animals and cities for their children.” But when Moshe responded to them, he mentioned the children first and then the animals. Keep in mind that at that time, cows and sheep were not pets: livestock was one’s capital, money, and work. Moshe noticed that these men, quite literally, put their money before their children!

Finally, after listening to Moshe, the leaders of the tribes realized their Freudian slip and told Moshe that they would do what he ordered them (beMidbar 32:25-26): “Our children, our women, and all our animals will stay there in the mountains of Gil’ad, while we prepare for war.” Now, they mentioned the children first, their families, and then the animals. Although this terrible difference in the scale of values is not explicitly discussed but occurs subconsciously, it seems they understood they were mistaken. It was enough to hear Moshe repeating what they said, but in the correct order of priorities, for them to learn the lesson.

URGENT vs. IMPORTANT

Surely, we all know that our children are more important than our work. Any father or mother we ask will obviously answer that they value their children much more than their material possessions. However, we parents do not always act in accordance with that. That is to say: I know it is very important to be with my children, to dedicate time to them, listen to them, play with them, “but I don’t have time.” I know I have to take an interest in them, talk about how their day was, and know what they are doing on the internet, “but I am so busy.” Thus, unintentionally and without planning, we have no time (or energy) left for “the most important thing in our lives.”

Sometimes, unintentionally, we put our children in a second category. I remember something funny but also sad: one of my friends in South America had a domestic employee to whom she entrusted her children, almost to raise them, but she did not allow her to use her washing machine because she did not trust her to wash the clothes without ruining them.

HISTORY REPEATS ITSELF

Sometimes, without realizing it, we repeat the history of our ancestors and do not invest the necessary time in our children. Surely, the men of Gad and Reuben knew perfectly well that their children were more important than their material possessions, but like almost all parents, they needed someone, in this case, Moshe, to remind them of the order of priorities.

Our compass, our reference, is the Torah. And every time we study it, it should clearly remind us that our children should come first.

SHABBAT SHALOM

Rabbanit Coty Bitton

מעשיך יקרבוך ומעשיך ירחקוך

ALL FOR MY CHILDREN Moshe Rabenu knows that his life will soon end. He also knows that his people, Am Israel, will need a leader to replace him. Who were the candidates to take Moshe’s place? The most natural thing at that time and in those circumstances would have been for Moshe’s sons to replace him. At the end of the day “all our sacrifice is for our children”. And Moshe might have thought that he deserved to see his sons following in his footsteps and be the next leaders of his people. Formally—and as the Jews saw in Egypt— a leader , a Pharaoh or a King,  establishes his own dynasty. Why would Moshe be different from any other political leader?  

MERIT or FAMILY Surprisingly, Moshe’s sons are not mentioned in the Tora as candidates for his replacement.  The Sages of the Midrash affirm that Moshe at first did think of his children as his natural  successors. How do we know? The Rabbis deduced this idea from the juxtaposition of the text that speaks of Tselofchad, and the text that speaks of Moshe’s replacement. Tselofchad had no sons. The daughters told Moshe that they deserved to inherit their father’s land. In the end, the Tora proves them right and Tselofchad’s daughters got their inheritance. The Sages indicate that at that time Moshe thought: “If the daughters of Tselofchad, that seemingly were unfit, ended up inheriting their father’s land, my sons, should also inherit my position of leadership, regardless of how fit they are for the job”.  At this point, and with an unusual absence of euphemisms, the Rabbis “reconstruct” God’s theoretical response to Moshe: “Your sons did nothing to deserve inheriting you (ישבו להם)! They did not attend the study house and did not make an effort to learn Torah.” In other words, Torah, study, intellectual and spiritual training, is not inherited from father to children like a piece of land. If there was no personal effort on the part of the children, inheriting automatically a position of leadership would be considered simply “nepotism.”

PROBATE COURT  At the end, HaShem, tells Moshe that the one who will succeed him will be Yehoshua, Moshe’s assistant. And again the Rabbis rationalized with their own words God’s decision: “Although he is neither your son nor your nephew, Yehoshua,[is your disciple] and he tried his best. During the years that he assisted you, Yehoshua would get up very early in the morning and show up at the House of Study (בית ועד). There, and before anyone else arrived, Yehoshua cleaned the floor, laid out the carpets and arranged the benches… he was willing to do any work that was necessary, regardless of whether or not that work was according to his status and prestige, for the sake of Tora and the people ….  Yehoshua stayed in the study house until late at night, and only left when everyone else had already left.” The comparison between Yehoshua and the sons of Moshe leaves no room for ambiguity. HaShem teaches Moshe – and through him to all of us – that we Jews belong to a “meritocratic” society: our own merits are more valuable than our inherited merits. Leadership positions are assigned on the basis of personal efforts and merit, by virtue of the individual’s talents, education, competence and specific aptitude for that particular position.

LAND AND LEADERSHIP.  Unlike a piece of land or a large fortune, Tora — and leadership in the realm of Tora — is NOT automatically inherited from father to son. The fact that my father is or was a great sage or a great leader does not make me, his son, a good man for the job.  And vice versa. It is possible that a great sage had a father who was not a great sage. Ultimately, it is up to one’s own effort. This is also how the great Jewish sage Aqabiya ben Mahalalel explained this idea to his son. When Aqabiya was about to die, his son asked him to “recommend” him to his colleagues, who were the most prominent rabbis and leaders of the Jewish people. “With your recommendation, dad, many doors are going to open for me, and I am going to be able to get close to the prestigious Rabbinical elite”.   But his father refused to recommend him to the Rabbis. His son asked him: “Did you find anything wrong with me? And his father answered “no”, but he added phrase that became one of the most important lessons the rabbis taught on this subject: “My son, it is not my recommendation that will give you prestige or a leadership position, but your actions”. In Hebrew: מעשיך יקרבוך ומעשיך ירחקוך “It will be your deeds and behavior, not my words, what will bring you closer or further away from the Rabbis.”

The rabbis disagree on this last point: are we remembering what happened in the times of King Menashe in the 7th century, before the common era (BCE) or what happened in the time of Apostomus, a Roman general who offended the Jews in public around the year 68 of the common era?

This tragic event might have happened twice. Either way, I’m going to explain here the first interpretation.

The Kingdom of Israel was divided into two kingdoms: Israel and Yehuda. The kingdom of Israel, the lost Ten Tribes, was destroyed in the year 722 BCE. The kingdom of Yehuda is the one who survived. We Jews, Yehudim, descend from the kingdom of Yehuda.

Menashe, king of Yehuda lived from 709 BCE until 642 BCE.

There are two facts that characterized his reign.

1. He was the king who reigned for most time in Jewish history: 55 years.

2. He was probably the worst king in the history of Am Israel. Undoubtedly, the worst king of the Kingdom of Yehuda.

His father was a great Tsadiq, Hizqiyahu, and according to our tradition, his grandfather was the prophet Yesha’ayahu. Menashe converted Yehuda into a vassal state of Assyria (אשור). And this meant that the Yehudim not only obeyed the Assyrian king but also adopted his religion. Menashe dedicated to the systematic elimination of Judaism, including all the Holy service in the Bet haMiqdash. He introduced worship to Ba’al, Asherah, and all the constellations of heaven, which was the idol-worshipping practice of Assyria. He brought to Israel the obot and ide’onim, that is, diviners, sorcerers, idolatrous wizards and all kind of superstitions. He commanded to kill and murder thousands of Yehudim, especially those who opposed his religious reforms. Some say that Menashe murdered his own grandfather, the prophet Yesha’ayahu. Menashe made the Tora to be completely forgotten for two generations.

In Kings II, chapter 21 we see in detail what Menashe did.

Melakhim II 21: 2-6: “Menashe did all what offended HaShem: he practiced the abominable idolatrous practices of the nations which HaShem had cast out before the Israelites. He rebuilt the pagan altars that his father Hizqiyahu had destroyed. He erected altars in honor of Baal and made an image of the goddess Asherah. He prostrated himself before all the stars of heaven and worshiped them … In both courtyards of the Temple of HaShem he built altars in honor of the stars of heaven. He sacrificed his own son in the fire, practiced magic and sorcery, and consulted necromancers and spiritualists. He continually did what offended the Lord, thus provoking His wrath.”

Lets us see now the text that tells us what happened, according to the first version, on the 17th of Tamuz.

Melakhim II 21: 7: “[Menashe] took the image of the goddess Asherah, which he had commanded to make, and set it in the [Temple’s] Sanctuary, in the place where HaShem had said to David and his son Solomon: “In this Temple in Jerusalem, the city that I have chosen from all the tribes of Israel, I have decided to dwell forever.”

When Menashe passed away he was succeeded by his son, Amon, who followed his bad ways. After two years Amon was killed, and his son, Yoshiyahu, the grandson of Menashe, was crowned king. Yoshiyahu was one of the best monarchs of Yehuda. In his days, while making repairs in the Temple of Jerusalem, the workers found a Sefer Tora that had been hidden in the times of Menashe. After reading the Tora, which had been virtually forgotten for more than 50 years, King Yoshiyahu decided to return to HaShem with all his heart, and for the first time in two generations, the Jews returned to the observance and practice of the Tora and Mitsvot. Yoshiyahu uprooted all idolatry and restored HaShem’s service in the Bet haMiqdash.

But in some aspects, the damage that Menashe had caused, was already irreparable. Despite the efforts of King Yoshiyahu, many people had already assimilated the idolatry of the Goyim. Many rabbis believed that the destruction of the first Bet HaMiqdash (586 BCE) was due indirectly to the actions of Menashe.

On the 17th of Tamuz, when we remember the placement of an idol in the Bet haMiqdash, we should also lament and do our own Teshuba for the wrongdoings of our ancestors in the times of king Menashe.

The 17th of Tamuz happens forty days after Shabuot. Moshe ascended Mount Sinai on the 6th of Sivan, and remained there for forty days. The people of Israel made the golden calf on the evening of the 16th of Tamuz, when they thought that Moshe was no longer going to return. When Moshe descended Mount Sinai and saw the Yehudim worshiping the golden calf, he broke the tablets containing the Ten Commandments.

There are many very interesting commentaries regarding this episode. There are those who explain that Moshe destroyed the Tablets to protect the people of Israel. How so? The Second Commandment says, “You shall not have other gods before Me … you shall not make for yourself any image [of idolatry] …”. The Rabbis explained that by breaking the tablets Moshe destroyed the written evidence that documented the terrible “betrayal” of the Jewish people to HaShem, by worshiping other gods. The Rabbis presented the following metaphor: “Imagine a woman who got married and after a few days there were some very negative comments about this woman’s behavior (suspicion of adultery). What did one of her relatives do? He took the Ketuba, the marriage certificate, and destroyed it. He said: it is better that this woman be considered unmarried than married. Likewise Moshe, when breaking the tablets he said: If I do not destroy this [incriminating] document the people of Israel will have no hope of being forgiven. So he broke the Tablets and then he told HaShem, trying to advocate for the people of Israel: Forgive them! They never got to read what was written on the Tablets!”.

Either way, the destruction of the Tablets of the Law meant a great tragedy. Firstly, because it meant not having anymore the Tables of the Testimony written “directly” by HaShem, which once broken were replaced by tables written by Moshe. And secondly because the destruction of the Tablets reminds us of the cause of this misfortune: the worshipping of the golden calf.

Finally, the Rabbis of the Midrash also teach us a positive aspect of remembering the destruction of the Tablets of the Law on the 17th of Tammuz. Ribbí Yehoshua Ben Levi (Masekhet Aboda Zara 4b) said that from the golden calf episode we learn that HaShem is willing to forgive even the most serious offenses. So we should never give up hope and say, “I have committed too many sins. HaShem will never forgive me. I am definitely at a point beyond  redemption. ” According to Ribbí Yehoshua Ben Levi no transgression can be more serious than the idolatry practiced with the golden calf. And we see that in the end, after repentance and Tefilot (prayers), HaShem forgave Am Israel. 

This is a very suitable message for a day of fasting, which should be dedicated to doing Teshuba: repent of our evil actions and get closer to HaShem.

The 17th of Tamuz is one of the four fasting days in which we remember the events that lead to the destruction of our first Bet haMiqdash (=Temple of Jerusalem) in 586 BCE and the consequent exile.

1. We fast on the 10th of Tebet, when the enemy began the siege of Jerusalem, which provoked untold starvation, epidemics, etc.

2. We observe a day of fast on the 17th of Tamuz because this is when the Babylonians made the first breach in the walls of the city, that is, when they came into the city.

3. After three weeks of battle and agonizing resistance, the enemy finally prevailed. That is why three weeks after the 17th of Tamuz we observe the 9th of Ab, the National day of mourning for the Jewish people. On this tragic day the first Bet haMiqdash was destroyed and burned (the Second Bet HaMiqdash was also destroyed on a 9th of Ab, in the year 68 of the Common Era). Thousands of Jews were killed or died from starvation and the rest were taken captives to Babylonia. A small Jewish population remained in Israel as vassals of the Babylonians.

4. A few years later, a group of Jews killed the Babylonian appointee, Gedaliah ben Ahiqam on the 3rd of Tishri. The consequences were devastating. The Babylonian emperor interpreted this murder as a rebellion against his kingdom and he ordered that the the small Jewish population that had remained in Israel after the destruction of the Temple be also killed or exiled.

These four dates 10 of Tebet, 17 of Tamuz, 9 of Ab and 3 of Tishri were established by our Prophets as days of fasting. In order to remember the destruction of the Bet haMiqdash and our of responsibility, encouraging us to introspect and repent.

It is interesting to notice that around the year 516 BCE, 70 years after the exile, around 40,000 Jews came back to Israel and built the Second Bet-haMiqdash. At that point, the prophet Zekharia and Anshe Keneset haGedola (The first Jewish Congress) canceled these fasting days and declared them  days of joy and celebration.

“Thus says HaShem, lord of Hosts: The fast of the fourth month and the fast of the fifth and the fast of the seventh and the fast of the tenth shall [now end and] be to the house of Yehuda seasons of joy and gladness and cheerful feasts…” (Zekharia 8:19)

When the second bet haMiqdash was destroyed, in the year 68 of the CE we started fasting again.

BH, When the Third Bet Hamiqdash will be built, במהרה בימינו, these fast days will be turned again into days of celebration. .

Minors: children under 13 and girls under 12 are completely exempt from this fast.

Pregnant women are exempt from this fast.

Nursing women, in many Sephardic communities the tradition is that after giving birth, women are exempt from fasting for 24 months, even when they are no longer breastfeeding their baby. In other Sephardic communities, and in most Ashkenazi communities, a woman is excused from fasting for 24 months only if she is still nursing her baby.

A person who feels sick, with symptoms of flu or fever, or a person with a chronic illness, such as diabetes, should not fast.

Elders should consult with their doctors to determine if fasting would affect their health. In which case they are exempt from fasting.

In addition, extreme your caution and try to keep yourself indoors protected from heat. In case of any sign of dehydration, nausea, vomits, very dry mouth, etc. DO NOT HESITATE TO BREAK THE FAST. 

אֶת-הַכֶּ֥בֶשׂ אֶחָ֖ד תַּעֲשֶׂ֣ה בַבֹּ֑קֶר וְאֵת֙ הַכֶּ֣בֶשׂ הַשֵּׁנִ֔י תַּעֲשֶׂ֖ה בֵּ֥ין הָֽעַרְבָּֽיִם

The rabbis mentioned 5 tragic events that happened on the 17th of Tamuz.  One of them was that the daily sacrifice in the Temple was discontinued.

Every day, in the Bet haMiqdash, two sacrifices were offered, one in the morning and one in the afternoon. The daily sacrifice was so important that it was also offered on Shabbat and even on Yom Kippur. This Mitsva was fulfilled uninterruptedly from the time it was commanded to Moshe Rabbenu until the 17th day of Tamuz in the year 586 BCE, that is, for about 700 years.

At the time of the first Bet haMiqdash, the Babylonian army invaded Jerusalem. The walls of the city were destroyed on the 9th day of Tammuz. But the Bet haMiqdash, which was protected by internal walls, continued to operate, and the offering of the daily sacrifice was the best evidence of it. The Gemara says that on the 13th of Tamuz the Cohanim, the priests who were in charge of the public sacrifices, began to run out of animals. The Cohanim tried to bribe the soldiers of the invading army and get the animals at any cost. This worked for four days, until the 17th of Tamuz. That day, for the first time in 700 years, the daily sacrifice was not brought. And the Bet HaMiqdash, though still standing for three more weeks, virtually ceased to function as such.

The Gemara (Yerushalmi Ta’anit Chapter 4) tells us that something similar happened in the days of the second Bet haMiqdash (year 68 of the common era). The Kohanim were trying to acquire animals from the enemy army. Two buckets filled with gold coins were being handed over to them thru the wall. And in return the Romans gave them two Kosher animals for the daily sacrifice. Until one day, the Romans took the gold and in the buckets they placed two pigs, which fortunately jumped out of the bucket before reaching the other side of the wall. This event, however, remained in the memory of the people as a national trauma.

In the famous book “The War of the Jews” (volume 6) author Flavius ​​Josephus writes: “Titus, the Roman general who led the conquest of Jerusalem in the year 68, ordered his army to open a breach in the wall of the city so that its soldiers could access it without difficulties. That day Titus heard that the daily sacrifice had not been offered [for the first time since 516 BCE] and the Jewish people, hearing this sad news was completely demoralized. “

Today, unfortunately, we do not have the Bet haMiqdash. But according to the indication of our prophets, the sacrifices have been replaced by the Tefilot (prayers). The first Tefilla we say in the day is called Shaharit, which comes to replace the morning sacrifice (tamid shel shahar), and the second Tefila of the evening, Minha,  replaces the sacrifice of the afternoon (tamid shel ben Ha’arbayim).

We also recite in the mornings a text from Tehilim, religious poems written by King David, called Shir Shel Yom. Every day of the week we recite a different text. And before the recitation we say: “This was the song that the Leviim were singing in the dukhan. The Levites, who were the assistants of the Cohanim, were in charge, among other things of the music and the songs that were sung in the Bet haMiqdash. These poems of Tehilim were sung by the Leviim, a choir of a minimum of twelve men, in the dukhan, which was a platform with three steps, at the moment that the daily sacrifice was offered, in the morning and in the afternoon.